This is from the end of the Chapter Five, of my second Sundry fic... Enjoy.
Little did I know how much fun my twentieth birthday wasn’t going to be. It was all going fine. Logan and I met my parents on the strip in Bayville, my ring tucked safely away on a chain under my shirt, and everything was going topnotch. My parents were very close, talking and laughing, my mother not molesting Logan (as she was inclined to do at times), and my father was keeping her check of her usual twit-like ways.
Neither Logan or I noticed at all the whizzing sounds of the bullets that hit me until it was to late. I couldn’t phase them through me, and It was to late to teleport. I had never been shot before, and it was a painful, searing, burning sensation, all along my back. I heard my mother shriek and I fell face forward onto the pavement.
"Jo!" Logan fell to the ground beside me, his senses tuned towards where the shots had come from.
I couldn’t hear him though. Everything was fuzzy, and my entire body suddenly ached. I tried to phase just enough for the bullets to pass the rest of the way through me, but I only got half way through the process, not having enough energy, driving them through nonexistent exit wounds. I heard my own scream of pain, and Logan turned me over, gasping at the sight of bullets pushing up through my stomach.
"Jo, hold on." He whispered. "The Doc will get this fixed...just hold on."
After that, I remember waking up in the hospital wing of the infirmary. My body still ached, and I was heavily bandaged...but something else was different too.
"Logan, she’s waking up." I heard Hank McCoy whisper.
My eyes cracked open, and I saw the rush for someone to be at my side.
"Jo...Jo, you’re OK. Do you know what happened?" Logan asked.
I thought back, "I got shot."
Logan nodded, "But you’re OK. You tried to phase the bullets, but you couldn’t hold it long enough. Doc got ‘em out, but...while you were out... you...you must have triggered something else...mentally."
"What?" I asked.
"Joanna...do you feel any...different."
"What are you talking, Logan?" I asked.
"Jo...you’ve opened a new area of your power."
I looked at him quizzically.
"You don’t have control anymore. You took on some physical mutations."
"What?" I asked, completely baffled. "What are you talking about?"
"Honey...Jo. Just think for a minute." Logan looked worried. "Don’t you feel...odd."
"I hurt like hell...I thought it was because I just got shot." I snapped.
"Doc...will you talk to her?" Logan moved away, rubbing at his eyes.
Hank took his spot, biting his lip. "Joanna, this is what happened... One of the bullets hit part of your brain...that part is what was keeping unexplored areas of your power in check -we never thought that this...this could happen. You’ve begun to take on the physical mutation of some of the people you’ve come into contact with."
"Like who?" I asked.
"Warren...Kurt...and Jon. As far as we know."
"What?" I asked, lifting my hand where I could see it. Blue-streaked skin was staring back at me. I gasped, and then I felt the wings under my shoulders as I fought to sit up, and the tail made it’s self evident, whipping underneath the blankets. My breath became fast pased, and I felt myself start to panic.
"Why? Why is this happening? Make it go away." I cried. "Dr. McCoy, make it go away."
"Joanna, calm down." Logan returned to my side, pulling me into his arms. "Relax. It’s OK."
"No, no, it’s not OK, Logan! Look at my skin!"
"If this is about how you look, then we have a lot to talk about, Jo." Logan held my face in his hands. "Relax."
"Logan...I don’t want to be different." I shook my head. "I want this all to go away again."
"Shh..." He let me hide against his shoulder. "We’re working on what happened, sweetheart. You just need to relax."
"Other then this opening of your mutation, Joanna...you’re fine. The wounds have healed nicely, I was able to remove all of the bullets... The police haven’t, however, been able to catch who ever did this to you. We believe that who ever did this, may have known that it may have caused this unlocking of your mutation." Hank stood up. "If you think you’re ready, maybe you’d like to take a walk? You’ve been out for almost three days."
I looked at Logan, "Does everyone know about this? ...This mutation thing?"
Logan nodded. "We’ve all stayed with you, in shifts. Rogue watched it happen and freaked."
I sat back. "I don’t want to go out there like this."
"Joanna, c’mon... it’s fine." Logan coaxed me. "You’re beautiful, wings, tail, and all."
"All? Is there something else?" I asked. "Besides the blue pigmenting?"
Dr. McCoy and Logan looked at one another. Hank nodded, and moved to hand a small hand mirror to Logan.
"Before I let you look..." Logan looked looked me straight in the eye. "I still love you...this doesn’t make any difference. Okay?"
I felt my eyes grow hard, and I took the mirror from him, lifting it. The face staring back at me wasn’t mine. I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the yellow eyed demon away. More blue stained my forehead, cheeks, and chin, but there was tan coloring much like the pigment coloration of John. I felt the tears flow from the corners of my eyes.
"Jo...it’s not that bad." Logan tried to sweet-talk me, taking the mirror away. "It’s kind of sexy..."
"Are you crazy, Logan? I’m a fucking monster." I covered my face with my hands.
"Hey..." Logan pulled my hands down. "Don’t do that. Yea, so you’ve got some pretty interesting identifying marks, but so what? I still love you, regardless. Doesn’t that mean anything to you?"
I cried, soaking the front of Logan’s shirt.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Friday, October 14, 2005
Prose '05
From "X-Men Legends", edited by creator Stan Lee, Jennifer Heddle tells the story of Rogue, an outcast in her own body after she finds herself sharing it with witty and popular Carol Danvers. "The Stranger Inside" by Jennifer Heddle.
Tuesday
Professor Xavier told me a long time ago that keeping a diary might help me deal with all of the stuff going on my head, but I laughed at him back then.
Now though, things are different. The Professor is gone, and, well, maybe this is the least I can do for him since I wasn’t real great to him when he was here. Better then nothing, right?
Who am I kidding? The truth is, Inferno really did a number on me, what with the members of the team turning against each other, that horrible evil I felt when I kissed Warren Worthington, my show down with that demon, Nasty -and I guess it can’t hurt to try using a diary to help me sort things out. Besides, it’s not like the rest of the X-Men are falling over themselves to take my mind of things or help me feel better.
I found this notebook in an abandoned room in the ghost town where we’re living right now, me and the rest of the X-Men. There were a bunch of reciepies scribbled on the first few pages, but it was all for food I’d rather die then eat, so I just ripped them out and threw them away where no one’d find them. Times like this I really get homesick for Mississippi. No one can make fried chicken worth anything and sometimes I think I’d beg, borrow, or steal for some real sweet potato pie.
Is this what I’m supposed to be writing about? Food? The Professor’s not here to tell me what’s right and I don’t know what I’m doing. Maybe I should give up now before I do something really stupid.
Friday
Well, I’m back. I don’t like to think of myself as a quitter so I’m not going to give up.
The Professor told me way back when that I should try writing down my feelings about Carol Danvers being trapped inside my head, but the problem is I don’t understand what I’m feeling half the time. I don’t want here. I didn’t ask for it. But I don’t see that there’s anything either of us can do about it any time soon.
Thursday
So Carol thinks she can take over this diary just like she takes over everything else in my life. I’ll just ignore her is all. She can write whatever she wants but I don’t have to read it. This is my notebook. I found it.
I bet she doesn’t even mind being stuck out here in the middle of no where, as long as she’s got the other X-Men around. I get so jealous when they bring Carol up -I know they like her better then they like me. I just wish they weren’t so darn obvious about it. I put my life on the line just as much as anyone else, but I’ll never be able to live down my past.
I’m not throwing myself a pity party. Most of the time things are fine, but sometimes...I miss my foster mother Mystique. At least I knew she cared about me, even if she did have a funny way of showing it.
Monday
Well I blew it, again. Got into a tangle with Dazzler and everyone took her side, of course. It started out innocent enough -I told Longshot I was keeping a diary and he’d never even heard the word before, can you believe that? So I was having a grand old time explaining it to him when Alison showed up and gave me a hard time. Things went from bad to worse real fast after that. Can’t she leave him alone for one minute? You’d think I was bouncing on his lap the way she got her back up like a polecat in heat. Like I could seduce him even if I wanted to.
I wonder how long it’ll be before Storm kicks me off of the team and makes me fend for myself. I wonder why I don’t just beat her to the punch and have Gateway send me somewhere far away from here.
But where would I go? Mutants aren’t safe anywhere, especially when they’re on their own. Besides, I bet as soon as Carol took control of my body again she’d come right back to Austrailia.
I’m just so tired of them hating me.
Thursday
Longshot and me went for a walk today. Somehow I managed to get him by his lonesome and we wandered around the outskirts of town for awhile. He was in one of his moods, where he’s thinking about something serious and nobody can figure out what’s the matter and he won’t tell nobody what’s wrong.
Even though I tried my best to draw Longshot out he didn’t say much, but it was nice keeping company with him anyway. The conversation went something like this:
Me: Are you feeling OK, sugar?
Him: Fine. Thanks
Me: Sure there isn’t anything you want to talk about?
Him: I’m sure. Thanks.
Me: The sky sure is a great color green today, isn’t it?
Him: Yea. Thanks.
On our way back to town we found some pretty wildflowers that he put in my hair for me, careful not to touch my skin of course. I was in a real good mood about it until we got back and I saw Alison scowling at us. Kept the smile on my face though and didn’t say anything nasty.
She can touch him. I can’t. So why is she jealous? It’s not like she would want to trade places with little ol’ me is it? Hah. That’s almost funny. Almost.
Sunday
You know what? I’m used to being alone. I’ve been doing it for so long that I don’t even notice it anymore, it’s like breathing or not touching people, it’s just second nature to me. People try to talk to me or be nice, and I snap at them or tell them to get lost. And I sit here wondering what I did to get them all hot and bothered. Am I that afraid of someone getting to close to me that I push everyone in the opposite direction? Is it my own fault that I can’t really call any of the X-Men my friends? Carol always seems to confident when she talks about her friends. I wonder what it’s like, to be so sure of who you are and where you came from, and who will be in your corner when things get tight. I don’t have Mystique anymore, I don’t even have the Professor. How does she lean on people so easily? Who do I have to lean on?
Sunday
I had a talk with Storm today. I’m not sure what brought it on. Maybe it’s because I’ve been feeling even more down then usual lately. Storm said something really smart, and let me make sure I get this right...
You can’t love other people until you love yourself.
I’ve heard it before, of course, but somehow, when Storm says it there’s more wisdom in the words.
I thought about what she said for a couple of hours, and then I went and sat with Gateway for a couple of hours. The quiet company was just what I needed.
Monday
Something funny happened today.
I took my body back from Carol during dinner a few hours ago. I was tired of being shut out so with one giant push -bam! I was back in control...Except, Carol was eating pea soup, and I hate pea soup, and I spit it all over the place and almost choked on it and wound up covering poor Petey with green goop.
I guess it doesn’t sound funny when I just write it down like that, but the thing was that everyone started laughing, even Petey. Not at me, but with me, and then I was laughing too, and suddenly I felt like maybe I did belong there after all.
Thursday
I don’t think I really need to write in here as much anymore. Things are better with the X-Men, the memories of what went down with Inferno are finally starting to fade, and as for me and Carol...well, I don’t think we’ll ever truly get along, but we’ll get by. For now anyway. I think the Professor would be proud, if he knew. Maybe, where ever he is, he does know. I hope so.
Tuesday
Professor Xavier told me a long time ago that keeping a diary might help me deal with all of the stuff going on my head, but I laughed at him back then.
Now though, things are different. The Professor is gone, and, well, maybe this is the least I can do for him since I wasn’t real great to him when he was here. Better then nothing, right?
Who am I kidding? The truth is, Inferno really did a number on me, what with the members of the team turning against each other, that horrible evil I felt when I kissed Warren Worthington, my show down with that demon, Nasty -and I guess it can’t hurt to try using a diary to help me sort things out. Besides, it’s not like the rest of the X-Men are falling over themselves to take my mind of things or help me feel better.
I found this notebook in an abandoned room in the ghost town where we’re living right now, me and the rest of the X-Men. There were a bunch of reciepies scribbled on the first few pages, but it was all for food I’d rather die then eat, so I just ripped them out and threw them away where no one’d find them. Times like this I really get homesick for Mississippi. No one can make fried chicken worth anything and sometimes I think I’d beg, borrow, or steal for some real sweet potato pie.
Is this what I’m supposed to be writing about? Food? The Professor’s not here to tell me what’s right and I don’t know what I’m doing. Maybe I should give up now before I do something really stupid.
Friday
Well, I’m back. I don’t like to think of myself as a quitter so I’m not going to give up.
The Professor told me way back when that I should try writing down my feelings about Carol Danvers being trapped inside my head, but the problem is I don’t understand what I’m feeling half the time. I don’t want here. I didn’t ask for it. But I don’t see that there’s anything either of us can do about it any time soon.
Thursday
So Carol thinks she can take over this diary just like she takes over everything else in my life. I’ll just ignore her is all. She can write whatever she wants but I don’t have to read it. This is my notebook. I found it.
I bet she doesn’t even mind being stuck out here in the middle of no where, as long as she’s got the other X-Men around. I get so jealous when they bring Carol up -I know they like her better then they like me. I just wish they weren’t so darn obvious about it. I put my life on the line just as much as anyone else, but I’ll never be able to live down my past.
I’m not throwing myself a pity party. Most of the time things are fine, but sometimes...I miss my foster mother Mystique. At least I knew she cared about me, even if she did have a funny way of showing it.
Monday
Well I blew it, again. Got into a tangle with Dazzler and everyone took her side, of course. It started out innocent enough -I told Longshot I was keeping a diary and he’d never even heard the word before, can you believe that? So I was having a grand old time explaining it to him when Alison showed up and gave me a hard time. Things went from bad to worse real fast after that. Can’t she leave him alone for one minute? You’d think I was bouncing on his lap the way she got her back up like a polecat in heat. Like I could seduce him even if I wanted to.
I wonder how long it’ll be before Storm kicks me off of the team and makes me fend for myself. I wonder why I don’t just beat her to the punch and have Gateway send me somewhere far away from here.
But where would I go? Mutants aren’t safe anywhere, especially when they’re on their own. Besides, I bet as soon as Carol took control of my body again she’d come right back to Austrailia.
I’m just so tired of them hating me.
Thursday
Longshot and me went for a walk today. Somehow I managed to get him by his lonesome and we wandered around the outskirts of town for awhile. He was in one of his moods, where he’s thinking about something serious and nobody can figure out what’s the matter and he won’t tell nobody what’s wrong.
Even though I tried my best to draw Longshot out he didn’t say much, but it was nice keeping company with him anyway. The conversation went something like this:
Me: Are you feeling OK, sugar?
Him: Fine. Thanks
Me: Sure there isn’t anything you want to talk about?
Him: I’m sure. Thanks.
Me: The sky sure is a great color green today, isn’t it?
Him: Yea. Thanks.
On our way back to town we found some pretty wildflowers that he put in my hair for me, careful not to touch my skin of course. I was in a real good mood about it until we got back and I saw Alison scowling at us. Kept the smile on my face though and didn’t say anything nasty.
She can touch him. I can’t. So why is she jealous? It’s not like she would want to trade places with little ol’ me is it? Hah. That’s almost funny. Almost.
Sunday
You know what? I’m used to being alone. I’ve been doing it for so long that I don’t even notice it anymore, it’s like breathing or not touching people, it’s just second nature to me. People try to talk to me or be nice, and I snap at them or tell them to get lost. And I sit here wondering what I did to get them all hot and bothered. Am I that afraid of someone getting to close to me that I push everyone in the opposite direction? Is it my own fault that I can’t really call any of the X-Men my friends? Carol always seems to confident when she talks about her friends. I wonder what it’s like, to be so sure of who you are and where you came from, and who will be in your corner when things get tight. I don’t have Mystique anymore, I don’t even have the Professor. How does she lean on people so easily? Who do I have to lean on?
Sunday
I had a talk with Storm today. I’m not sure what brought it on. Maybe it’s because I’ve been feeling even more down then usual lately. Storm said something really smart, and let me make sure I get this right...
You can’t love other people until you love yourself.
I’ve heard it before, of course, but somehow, when Storm says it there’s more wisdom in the words.
I thought about what she said for a couple of hours, and then I went and sat with Gateway for a couple of hours. The quiet company was just what I needed.
Monday
Something funny happened today.
I took my body back from Carol during dinner a few hours ago. I was tired of being shut out so with one giant push -bam! I was back in control...Except, Carol was eating pea soup, and I hate pea soup, and I spit it all over the place and almost choked on it and wound up covering poor Petey with green goop.
I guess it doesn’t sound funny when I just write it down like that, but the thing was that everyone started laughing, even Petey. Not at me, but with me, and then I was laughing too, and suddenly I felt like maybe I did belong there after all.
Thursday
I don’t think I really need to write in here as much anymore. Things are better with the X-Men, the memories of what went down with Inferno are finally starting to fade, and as for me and Carol...well, I don’t think we’ll ever truly get along, but we’ll get by. For now anyway. I think the Professor would be proud, if he knew. Maybe, where ever he is, he does know. I hope so.
Saturday, September 24, 2005
Jack's Story (A spin off of a Buffy Story, just read it)
Jack’s Story
It was back in 1963, in a sleepy little back-water town in Middle-of-Nowhere, Massachusetts. I had just dropped the body of a filthy little street whore, and was on my way back into the pub I had just vacated so I could drink unseen, when I saw her.
She was with a group of friends, but she stuck out and I could feel the power radiating from her. Her long brown hair was pulled back from her face, eyes outlined in black eyeliner. Her jeans were tight in all the right places, with a flare at the bottom. She wore a peasant top -which hadn’t quite taken off yet, with a grungy denim jacket over it. Her laugh was mystical, and I had a feeling that the ‘friends’ she was with were too.
I followed her into the pub, and the friends disappeared. She went towards the bar, and I followed, not far behind. She intrigued me in a way a human woman hadn’t in a very long time. She was beauty, probably brains, and I just knew she was powerful. I watched her from the shadows as she ordered a tall class of frothy beer. She turned on the barstool to scope out the crowd. When her eyes passed over me for a moment, I tried to look nonchalant. Shy, maybe, taking a pull from my own bottle of beer.
It wasn’t long before I found out her name -Jade. And that her skin was smooth and hot under my fingers. It was a quick decision to hold off on her slaughter. I wanted to know her better; who she was, what she could do.
She was one of the first women who intrigued me since my turning, 75 years before by my cousin William.
For nearly all of these 75 years, I had wandered from city to city by night, hopping a ship from England to New York City several years before now. Since then, I was making my way from the Big Apple to the South before slowly (but surely) making my way to all of the continental United States.
After my intial turning, I had lived with William and his woman, Drusilla, avoiding their other companions, Angel and Darla as much as possible. Angel could see to be particularly cruel to me, and Darla came off as a sort of love-sick skank, who would take it where she could get it, and Angel wasn’t about to say no to her. While I was with them, I never found a companion of my own. William had Drusilla, Angel had Darla. I had William, I suppose, in away. He had changed me, because I was the final link between him and his human life, and he spared me from death because the human side of him had missed me -his only friend. But we soon tired of one another, and I left.
I went of my own free will, not even a year after I had been changed. William was blood thirsty, and enjoyed the torture of his victims (usually with railroad spikes, hence his nickname, Spike), before taking that sublime pleasure in finishing them off, savoring the taste of them in his mouth for a long while after a good kill. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy the killing, because I did. But I didn’t take the perverse pleasure in it that Spike did.
But now I was in Massachusetts. Killing dirty street-whores because the delectable bits I would prefer were getting smater, and traveling in groups. It was probably a sign that I could leave -when people became more aware of the death and decay around their sad little town. But I liked it there.
I liked the pubs, and the people. There was something different about this backwater town that wasn’t in any of others. And I just knew that "something" was Jade.
After our inital meeting, I began meeting Jade regularly at the pub where we first met. I don’t think she realized at first what I was, but she began to put pieces together -like when I couldn’t meet her for lunch, or how she never saw me around anywhere during the day. There were probably warning signals after the firs time had sex too. She was a smart girl, just as I had first thought. This was before the days of romanticized vampires in novels by authors like Anne Rice (although I always did have a soft spot in my heart for Marius and Armand...), but Jade wasn’t afraid anyway. She was a fool to trust me, and yet I let her. Something in me told me to let it go, let her think that I was a kind and generous person and not the monster I really was.
We had only known each other for a few short weeks when Jade led me from our usual haunt back to her place. She hadn’t figured it all out yet, but she was starting to realize that there was something different about me.
"I want to show you something, Jack. Come in." She grinned at me, unlocking the door to her flat. The interior decoration was 1960's Witch, if you can picture that. Hippie decor, along with all the supplies the up-and-coming witch of the time needed. It was nice.
The whole place smelled of spices, and aromatic candles. I made myself comfortable on the couch, propping my feet up the chipped coffee table, while Jade got us drinks.
"You know, we could have gotten the same thing in the pub." I pointed out. It wasn’t safe for her to be this alone with me. It was easy for me to get carried away if we were alone -which we had been before, and I had only barely been able to keep myself in check. In a crowd, I could still smell other people, pick out new victims...with Jade, I had to control myself.
"I love how you call it a pub, Jack. It’s a bar...we’re not in Europe anymore."
I took a sip of my drink, trying not to look directly at her. The smell of her flesh, the sound of her heartbeat was intoxicating.
"So...c’mon...tell me about you, Jack. We’re always talking about me. What do you hate? What do you like?"
I shrugged. "Well...I don’t like lite beer for one thing...but I like you."
"You are such a guy, Jack." She smiled, leaning back against the arm of the chair, her now bare feet nudging under my thigh, as she took a drink from the glass. "Seriously...where are you from?"
"Kent, originally. But I travel a lot."
"Really? Where have you been? Anywhere exotic?" She asked, grinning.
I thought. "No where exotic... Mostly small towns." Where a few deaths wouldn’t go unnoticed -that was my high. When the deaths I caused were found out, but never solved. "Like here. I’ve been all over Europe, and now I’ve made my way from New York, here."
"Where are you going next?" She asked.
"I’m not sure. I hope to eventually hit all fifty states." If I wasn’t killed first, anyway.
"Sounds fun." She smiled. "What do you do? For a job, I mean. How do you afford to travel?"
I smiled at her. I couldn’t help it. It was such an innocent question. I lived off the poor bastards I killed, but I couldn’t tell her that. "My inheritance from my parents keeps me on my feet. I live pretty frugally."
She nodded. "I couldn’t tell...all the drinking you do. Doesn’t seem to frugal to me."
"I don’t really drink that much. And besides...I’m there for the people, not the service."
She placed her half-empty glass on the coffee table deliberately, and leaned forward to kiss me. Her mouth was wet, and I could taste the beer on her breath. I set my glass down too, pulling her up into my lap. My fingers pulled the rubber band easily from her hair, letting the silky tresses fall around her shoulders, past her face. The locks brushed my face and shoulders.
Jade looked down into my eyes, soft panting emitting from her lips.
"You’re special, Jack."
"I could say the same about you." I whispered before shutting her up with another mind-blowing kiss.
She was the one that started taking off clothes. It was moving fast, and I didn’t want to stop it. Her hands swooped quickly to conquer my belt buckle, pulling it from my belt loops in a fast motion.
"You’ve done that before, have you?" I raised an eyebrow. She smiled, and kissed me again.
"Maybe...once or twice." She shrugged. Her skirt was next, my fingers pulling down the delicate zipper, pushing the fabric down her thighs, discarding it in the accumulating pile on the floor.
"Get rid of your stupid shoes." She sighed, leaning back. "I’ll be right back. Meet me in the bedroom. It’s through that door."
I watched after her, with a slight sigh. Women.
I did as she said though, removing the rest of my clothes, and my ‘stupid shoes’, leaving them beside the couch. When she came back, she was fully undressed too. We didn’t waste time appreciating each other. She licked a line from my shoulder up my throat, her mouth pausing for a moment on the scar from my bite mark. She didn’t question it yet, and instead continued her trail, ending with a nibble on my ear, then a kiss on my mouth. The fire hadn’t been dampened by her short little trip to the bathroom.
Only moments passed before I trapped her underneath me, liking the control-position. Her arms linked almost lazily over my neck, her knees tightened against my hips as I thrust downward into her the first time. She groaned, biting down into my shoulder, making sexy little grunting noises into my ear.
Afterwards, she curled up against my side for a few minutes, her index fingers tracing patterns against my stomach. The smell of her after sex was even more incredible, if that was even possible. The moon was casting a glow across the room as I ran my fingers through her hair.
"What is this?" She asked, stopping the pattern tracing, to examine my neck.
"Bite mark. I was bit by a...dog, when I was younger."
"Oh. Weird place for a dog bite." She sat up, the sheets still held tight across her chest. "You want to go get something to eat? On me."
I glanced over at the clock. "It’s kind of late. I should get going."
"...Am I ever going to see you again?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.
I smiled, pressing a kiss to her lips. "You’ll see me again. Trust me."
Not long after I had left Jade, I felt the pangs of feed pelting the back of my mind. As soon as I was far enough away from Jade’s flat, I found one of the few people still out in the sleepy little town. A drunk who had just stumbled out of one of the many local bars. I had seen him before, from afar. He would circulate the bars, getting kicked out of each one nightly. It wasn’t hard to lead him down the alley, and then suck him dry. My jaw twitched afterwards, and I made my way into the bar for one more unknowing victim before the sunrise.
As I promised, Jade and I continued to see a lot of one another. Every evening, I would feed on the vile patrons of local seedy pubs, then meet Jade, sweet Jade, at our favorite place. I spend a few hours with her, talking or making love. I say that because that’s what it was. I may have been a soulless demon, but I can honestly say that I loved her, human or not. Afterwards, I would find another victim, disposing of the body in an alley way. I was getting sloppy with my feedings -leaving bodies in plane sight. I wanted them found. I wanted the town in panic. I wanted to suck the entire town dry until it was me and Jade...and then turn her, so I could have her with me for always.
It was about a month or so after I had met Jade, and we had begun our nightly rituals that I was caught for the first time by a police officer. I had just sank my teeth into the throat of a drunk teenaged girl, whose whimpers were like music to my ears. He pulled a gun on me, and I laughed, dropping her still twitching body.
"Go ahead, fat man. Shoot me." I smiled maliciously. "It’ll hurt, but it’s not going to stop me." I licked the taste of the girl’s blood from my mouth, savoring it for a moment as she scampered away on her hands and knees, clutching her throat, the blood seeping through her fingers. She would be the first survivor. The police officer however, wasn’t so lucky.
I clutched his skull between my hands. "I’ll make this quick and painless..." His eyes widened.
"No, please...I have a family...a wife, two kids...please." The begging only made me hunger for his death more. I smiled.
"They’ll be joining you soon enough, I’m sure." A quick twist, and loud crack, and he slumped to the ground, and I made my way to Jade’s place, the adrenalin still rushing through me.
I knocked before opening the door. "Jade? You here?"
"In the bedroom, Jack." She called. "There’s stuff in the fridge if you’re hungry."
"No thanks, I just ate." I leaned in the doorway of her bedroom. "So, what are we doing tonight, love? Playful banter? Watching the telly? Or are we going to shake the house down again?"
Jade smiled. "I can’t tonight. I have homework."
I raised an eyebrow.
"Classes started today... Remember? I told you a couple of days ago...I’m taking classes at the University of Boston."
"Oh...right, right. Sorry, I forgot." I sighed, entering the bedroom, and sitting on the edge of the bed. "So...you’re working on this for...a long time?"
"Probably. Sorry, it’s totally lame." She sighed. "Maybe tomorrow we can do something? Go to the movies?"
"Sure. It would be a nice change." I nodded.
Jade was quiet for a moment. "So...do you want to go to an early show? Or a late show?"
I stretched out on the empty side of the bed, beside her. "What kind of early are we talking about here?"
"Like...one?"
"I can’t." I shook my head.
Jade sighed, looking at me. "Jack...are you afraid to be seen with me during the day or something?"
"No." I smiled, shaking my head. "I...ah...I don’t like the sun."
"Oh." She nodded, and turned back to her books. "Well, how about the four o’clock show? It’s not so bright then."
"I don’t know, Jade... I really...rather avoid it."
"Jack, is there something you’re not telling me about you?" She asked. "Something...important?"
"Depends on what you think is important, love." I tilted her chin towards me, and kissed her softly.
She took a deep breath. "I think you’re hiding something from me. Either...you’re ashamed of me, or you have some kind of weird skin disease...or something else?"
I smiled. "You’ll find out in time." I kissed her again. "I better let you study. I’ll see you tomorrow. Seven-ish."
Jade nodded, and watched me go towards the bedroom door, before she stopped me again. "Jack?"
"Hm?" I turned, my hand on the doorknob, half way out of the room.
"Are you...are you some kind of a...vampire or something?"
I smiled softly and continued out of the door.
"What kind of answer is that?"
The next night, there was no movie. We spent the evening in bed, trying to find unexplored places of each other. Afterwards, Jade lay cradled in my arms.
"You didn’t answer my question last night." She turned her head up to look at me.
I smoothed the blanket across her legs, and shrugged. "What if I was?"
"I don’t know...I guess...it’s...I don’t know." Jade shrugged. "It’s something you probably want to know about -especially if you’re dating the guy whose the reason all of these people have been dying of mysterious bite wounds for the last couple of months."
I laughed. "It’s been going on a little longer then a couple of months, love. Just on here."
"How long?" She asked.
I smiled, and thought back. "How long since what? There are a lot of time frames to look at."
"How long have you...been a vampire? Been killing people?"
"First of all, I really only kill those who deserve it most, and second of all, you don’t want to know how long."
"Yes, I really do. I think I should know. I have some right to know."
I took a deep breath. "I was turned when I was twenty five, by my cousin William."
"How long ago, Jack?"
"Seventy-five years ago...or there abouts."
"You’re like...a hundred and five."
"Yea...there about." I nodded. "No where near as old as some."
"I don’t understand...how could...why would you..." Jade closed her eyes, pressing her palms against the sides of her head. "I don’t get it, Jack. Why didn’t you tell me this before? Why didn’t know? I am so stupid."
"No, no you’re not stupid. Jade, stop." I pulled her hands away from her face. "Hey, stop now." I turned her face back towards mine. "My being a vampire has nothing to do with you at all."
"Why are you here? Where you trying to...seduce me or something before you killed me?"
I sighed. "Jade, it’s not like that."
"Yes it is...you were slowly killing off the entire town before it was just me and you...and I was the last person here."
"No." I shook my head. "I care about you."
"How can you care about me, Jack? You don’t even have a soul."
"It’s possible to love someone, even without a soul."
"You’re a fucking demon... Oh my god. I’ve been screwing a demon." She froze at the realization.
"Hey, stop...Jade."
"I want you to leave. Now." She shook her head, pushing me away, pulling the sheets away as she climbed off of the bed. "Go, and don’t come back."
"You can’t keep me out."
"The hell I can’t." She shook her head. "Get out."
I nodded, and picked up my clothes in a leisurely fashion, fastening my jeans, and pulling on my boots. "You know, this kind of hysteria really doesn’t become you, Jade."
"Stop trying to talk to me, and get the hell out of my apartment." She turned away from me.
It hurt, being shoved away from her like that. I swallowed the pain, and shook my head. "Fine. I’ll go, but remember this later...I did love you...but that might not save you when the time comes."
"Get out." She hissed.
I stayed by the door for few moments after I pulled it closed behind me, my leather jacket slung over my shoulders. I could hear her moving around, probably putting guarding spells around the windows and doors, so I couldn’t gain entrance again. It was alright. I would get my chance with her eventually.
That night, I moved on to a neighboring town. I had grown sloppy, and the police were beginning to investigate, thinking the killings were due to a large animal of some kind. I was close enough to Jade, where I could still see her any time I wanted, and yet the ‘animal’ was moving on, towards the coast, which would hopefully deter any further investigation into the murders.
My new place was situated in a roomy crypt in a local cemetery that seemed to have been abandoned for the most part many years before. It was old, and hadn’t had a good mowing in a long time. It was good enough for a couple of weeks...and I would be careful for those weeks. Careful not to kill to many people, no matter how much I hungered for it, careful to show my face just enough that I looked like a tourist, not new to town. Careful that I wouldn’t be tracked.
I made my way back to the pub where I had met Jade, hoping to see her. She walked in with a group of her mystical friends, and I watched her from the back of the bar. She looked so sweet in her tight jeans, t-shirt, and red-down vest. I hungered for her, but I tried to resist the feeling. I just knew I would have the opportunity to change her soon enough, if I could just hold off on it a little while longer.
"What are you doing here?" She asked, touching my shoulder. I tried to look casual, sipping out of my beer.
"I like the beer. What’s your excuse?"
"Are you like...stalking me?"
"Hey, I was here before you even showed up, so back off, Jade." I plunked down my beer on the bar. "If anyone is stalking anyone, it’s you stalking me!"
"Excuse me?" She crossed her arms. "I’m not a vam-." My eyes widened and I shot her a look of contempt. "Vamper...you know...a flirt...ah...right. So, seriously. Why are you here? I thought you had like...moved on."
"I missed you." I shrugged. "I moved on, but I still want to see you once in awhile."
"I can’t, Jack." She shook her head. "Not right now. I can’t deal with that."
"C’mon, Jade. It wasn’t a big deal before you knew...why does it have to matter know?"
"Because! You could turn on me, and kill me in my sleep for all I know! I don’t know anything about you Jack!"
"You know I love you...that I’d do anything for you." I took her hand in mine, kissing her finger tips.
"Jack, stop...no. That’s not fair." She pulled her hands away. "You know I can’t say no to that..."
I smiled, pulling her closer to myself, my hand around her hips. I kissed her softly, savoring the flavor of her lips for a moment. "Let me buy you a drink, hm?"
"No, I should be getting home. I have class in the morning."
"You just got here." I pushed a lock of her hair behind her ear, and kissing her again. "Come on...one drink."
"No, really, I can’t. I’m here with friends."
"You mean those people that disappear the moment you stepped into the bar?" I whispered in her ear. "I know they’re not real, sweet heart."
"I still have class in the morning."
"Then why are you still standing here?" I asked.
"I seem to be frozen in this spot..." She looked down at her feet.
"Let me walk you home, then?"
It took her a moment, but she finally nodded. "Sure. You can walk me home...but you can’t come in."
"Then why don’t you come with me to my place?" I offered.
Jade raised an eyebrow.
"Alright, so maybe that isn’t such a hot idea. How about getting a motel room with me?"
"No." She smiled, shaking her head.
"Alright, alright... C’mon. Let me walk you."
I was unaware at the time that Jade was secretly doing research, not only on me and my history as a vampire, but on vampires cursed with souls. I didn’t know yet that she wanted to return my soul to me. After she had read about my sprees across Europe, and my short time with Spike, she had become almost obsessed with returning me to human-state. She didn’t want me cursed, she wanted me to be whole again...to be able to resist the temptation of blood-lusting, and no longer thirst for the throats of innocents.
It was a long time, and four moves to various towns in the same approximate area of Massachusetts, until I found out what she was planning...and when I found out, it was much to late.
Jade had gone mad. Absolutely batty. I arrived at her apartment with a bottle of wine, and bag of take out. She had smiled at me, and invited me inside.
"I brought food."
"Oh, leave it on the counter. I want to show you something."
"...You already tried that ploy to get me to sleep with you, so this must be something else...what’s up?"
Jade laughed. "Come into the living room, and sit down."
"...Okay. Is this going to be something kinky?" I asked, sitting down on one of the satin pillows situated in the circle on the floor.
"...I don’t know...do you want it to be?" She asked. "I’ve got a pair of cuffs in the bedroom, but I was just gonna use rope..."
"What’s going on?" I asked.
"I need your help with something...with a spell."
"Excuse me? Jade, I can’t...I mean, what are you trying to do?"
"Can’t you just trust me?" She asked, sighing.
"What is this about?" I asked, trying to move away as she began to wrap the thick rope around my hands, behind my back. "Jade?"
"Just...sit and be quiet for a little while, alright? It shouldn’t take long."
"Jade, tell me what’s going on." I glared down on her as she moved, wrapping more of the same rope around my ankles. "Jade..."
"Would you please relax, Jack?" She requested, with a sigh, moving away from where I was bound, to get her supplies from the shelves around the room, situating it all in a circle. It was the perfectly round crystal ball, that glowed slightly in her hands that really clued me into what she was up to.
"Jade...what you’re doing...it’s not right."
"Jack, if you aren’t going to be quiet, I will silence you forever." Her voice was low, and serious. Her pupils were dilated, and I tried to struggle from the binds, but they were to tight.
"C’mon...let me go, and we’ll have dinner, have a drink. Please, let me go."
"No." She sat down on the pillow opposite of mine. "I will let you go as soon as I am finished, and no sooner. Now please...sit there, and be silent."
"Jade...what if something goes wrong?" I wasn’t going to just sit there and be quiet while the (possible) love of my life tried to curse me.
"Look, this isn’t what you think it is, okay?" She sighed.
"You’re trying to put a gypsy curse on me! I’ve seen it done!"
"No, I’m not!"
"So you’re not trying to re-instate my soul?"
Jade looked away, lighting the candles.
"Jade! Look, you can’t do this. I won’t let you do this."
"I have to! I can’t live seeing you like this anymore! I want a boyfriend who can go out with me during the day, I want a boyfriend who doesn’t have to suck people dry to survive. I want a boyfriend I can trust not to kill me in my sleep."
"I would never kill you in your sleep." It would be way to difficult to change her that way.
"But I can’t know that, Jack. I love you. I have to do this for us...alright?"
I was quiet then, still struggling to loosen the rope to free at least my hands.
I wasn’t paying attention to the words of Jade’s spell, not that I would have remembered them anyway. I wasn’t snapped back into the real world until I felt like my chest was being ripped open, and Jade started screaming, slumping over, her body twitching.
"Jade!" I tried to ignore my own pain, pulling harder at the restraints on my wrists. I felt the shedding of my old ways, suddenly much more human...docile then I had been before. More like the way I had been before Spike’s selfishness, of turning me.
And I had never thought that before...that Spike had been selfish in turning me. I had looked at it as a gift...but for that instant, as I watched helplessly as Jade died, trying to save me from a fate of evil, I felt that being a vampire had been a demonic curse.
When I was finally able to cut myself from my bindings, Jade was already gone, not that there had been anything I could have done anyway. I threw away the sliced ropes, and called the appropriate people. I was sitting at the kitchen table, tearing apart a piece of bread on a plate when the coroner’s office knocked on the door.
"Where’s the body?" The man’s voice seemed cold, and unfeeling, but I suppose in that profession you have to be a little harder then usual.
"Do you know what happened?" The second man asked.
"I don’t know." I shook my head. "I got here a little after seven with dinner...she was acting kind of strange. She was heavy into the wicca thing." I shrugged. "She must have taken it to far. She just collapsed."
I watched as they bagged her, and loaded her up onto the cart. The younger of the two, turned as a last thought.
"I’m really very sorry for your loss. I grew up with Jade. She was a great girl...but she depended on magic a little to much." He looked sad for a moment, giving me a weak smile, before pulling the door quietly closed behind him.
A few hours later, I was still in Jade’s apartment, just sitting on the couch, looking around. I almost didn’t notice the knocking on the door. I forced myself up from the couch, opening the door slowly.
"I’m sorry, Jade’s not here." I said, automatically, not recognizing the girl standing there. She was probably only about seventeen, and was flanked by two other vampires, and a set of werewolves. I could smell it on them. I moved in a defensive kind of mode.
The girl sent looks to the men behind her, and they stepped back, wordlessly.
"I’m not looking for...Jade, was it?" She shook her head. "I’m looking for you..."
And it was the first time I was ever introduced to the Protector -the one girl, in all the world, whose job it was to protect me, and my kind. Vampires with souls, and werewolves. She was spunky, wise...totally in love with one of the others, Damian. But I liked her. I agreed to join her Circle, even though I didn’t know many of the ropes in the gig, but I learned.
And I learned enough, that when Devon came around, I was the one who found her, along with Angel (who I had caught up with after I made my way to Sunnydale, California), and of course Gabriel...but we don’t talk about him very much anymore.
I’ll admit that I’m in love with Devon...but she loves me too. Sometimes, I still find myself missing Jade, but I know that she gave up a lot to try and make me whole again. Her entire dream didn’t get to come true. I still can’t go out in the sun, but holy water and crosses don’t bother me as much, and I can eat garlic with only a twinge of discomfort. Everyday, I thank her for her courage...to give up her own life, to save mine, even if that was originally her plan.
It was back in 1963, in a sleepy little back-water town in Middle-of-Nowhere, Massachusetts. I had just dropped the body of a filthy little street whore, and was on my way back into the pub I had just vacated so I could drink unseen, when I saw her.
She was with a group of friends, but she stuck out and I could feel the power radiating from her. Her long brown hair was pulled back from her face, eyes outlined in black eyeliner. Her jeans were tight in all the right places, with a flare at the bottom. She wore a peasant top -which hadn’t quite taken off yet, with a grungy denim jacket over it. Her laugh was mystical, and I had a feeling that the ‘friends’ she was with were too.
I followed her into the pub, and the friends disappeared. She went towards the bar, and I followed, not far behind. She intrigued me in a way a human woman hadn’t in a very long time. She was beauty, probably brains, and I just knew she was powerful. I watched her from the shadows as she ordered a tall class of frothy beer. She turned on the barstool to scope out the crowd. When her eyes passed over me for a moment, I tried to look nonchalant. Shy, maybe, taking a pull from my own bottle of beer.
It wasn’t long before I found out her name -Jade. And that her skin was smooth and hot under my fingers. It was a quick decision to hold off on her slaughter. I wanted to know her better; who she was, what she could do.
She was one of the first women who intrigued me since my turning, 75 years before by my cousin William.
For nearly all of these 75 years, I had wandered from city to city by night, hopping a ship from England to New York City several years before now. Since then, I was making my way from the Big Apple to the South before slowly (but surely) making my way to all of the continental United States.
After my intial turning, I had lived with William and his woman, Drusilla, avoiding their other companions, Angel and Darla as much as possible. Angel could see to be particularly cruel to me, and Darla came off as a sort of love-sick skank, who would take it where she could get it, and Angel wasn’t about to say no to her. While I was with them, I never found a companion of my own. William had Drusilla, Angel had Darla. I had William, I suppose, in away. He had changed me, because I was the final link between him and his human life, and he spared me from death because the human side of him had missed me -his only friend. But we soon tired of one another, and I left.
I went of my own free will, not even a year after I had been changed. William was blood thirsty, and enjoyed the torture of his victims (usually with railroad spikes, hence his nickname, Spike), before taking that sublime pleasure in finishing them off, savoring the taste of them in his mouth for a long while after a good kill. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy the killing, because I did. But I didn’t take the perverse pleasure in it that Spike did.
But now I was in Massachusetts. Killing dirty street-whores because the delectable bits I would prefer were getting smater, and traveling in groups. It was probably a sign that I could leave -when people became more aware of the death and decay around their sad little town. But I liked it there.
I liked the pubs, and the people. There was something different about this backwater town that wasn’t in any of others. And I just knew that "something" was Jade.
After our inital meeting, I began meeting Jade regularly at the pub where we first met. I don’t think she realized at first what I was, but she began to put pieces together -like when I couldn’t meet her for lunch, or how she never saw me around anywhere during the day. There were probably warning signals after the firs time had sex too. She was a smart girl, just as I had first thought. This was before the days of romanticized vampires in novels by authors like Anne Rice (although I always did have a soft spot in my heart for Marius and Armand...), but Jade wasn’t afraid anyway. She was a fool to trust me, and yet I let her. Something in me told me to let it go, let her think that I was a kind and generous person and not the monster I really was.
We had only known each other for a few short weeks when Jade led me from our usual haunt back to her place. She hadn’t figured it all out yet, but she was starting to realize that there was something different about me.
"I want to show you something, Jack. Come in." She grinned at me, unlocking the door to her flat. The interior decoration was 1960's Witch, if you can picture that. Hippie decor, along with all the supplies the up-and-coming witch of the time needed. It was nice.
The whole place smelled of spices, and aromatic candles. I made myself comfortable on the couch, propping my feet up the chipped coffee table, while Jade got us drinks.
"You know, we could have gotten the same thing in the pub." I pointed out. It wasn’t safe for her to be this alone with me. It was easy for me to get carried away if we were alone -which we had been before, and I had only barely been able to keep myself in check. In a crowd, I could still smell other people, pick out new victims...with Jade, I had to control myself.
"I love how you call it a pub, Jack. It’s a bar...we’re not in Europe anymore."
I took a sip of my drink, trying not to look directly at her. The smell of her flesh, the sound of her heartbeat was intoxicating.
"So...c’mon...tell me about you, Jack. We’re always talking about me. What do you hate? What do you like?"
I shrugged. "Well...I don’t like lite beer for one thing...but I like you."
"You are such a guy, Jack." She smiled, leaning back against the arm of the chair, her now bare feet nudging under my thigh, as she took a drink from the glass. "Seriously...where are you from?"
"Kent, originally. But I travel a lot."
"Really? Where have you been? Anywhere exotic?" She asked, grinning.
I thought. "No where exotic... Mostly small towns." Where a few deaths wouldn’t go unnoticed -that was my high. When the deaths I caused were found out, but never solved. "Like here. I’ve been all over Europe, and now I’ve made my way from New York, here."
"Where are you going next?" She asked.
"I’m not sure. I hope to eventually hit all fifty states." If I wasn’t killed first, anyway.
"Sounds fun." She smiled. "What do you do? For a job, I mean. How do you afford to travel?"
I smiled at her. I couldn’t help it. It was such an innocent question. I lived off the poor bastards I killed, but I couldn’t tell her that. "My inheritance from my parents keeps me on my feet. I live pretty frugally."
She nodded. "I couldn’t tell...all the drinking you do. Doesn’t seem to frugal to me."
"I don’t really drink that much. And besides...I’m there for the people, not the service."
She placed her half-empty glass on the coffee table deliberately, and leaned forward to kiss me. Her mouth was wet, and I could taste the beer on her breath. I set my glass down too, pulling her up into my lap. My fingers pulled the rubber band easily from her hair, letting the silky tresses fall around her shoulders, past her face. The locks brushed my face and shoulders.
Jade looked down into my eyes, soft panting emitting from her lips.
"You’re special, Jack."
"I could say the same about you." I whispered before shutting her up with another mind-blowing kiss.
She was the one that started taking off clothes. It was moving fast, and I didn’t want to stop it. Her hands swooped quickly to conquer my belt buckle, pulling it from my belt loops in a fast motion.
"You’ve done that before, have you?" I raised an eyebrow. She smiled, and kissed me again.
"Maybe...once or twice." She shrugged. Her skirt was next, my fingers pulling down the delicate zipper, pushing the fabric down her thighs, discarding it in the accumulating pile on the floor.
"Get rid of your stupid shoes." She sighed, leaning back. "I’ll be right back. Meet me in the bedroom. It’s through that door."
I watched after her, with a slight sigh. Women.
I did as she said though, removing the rest of my clothes, and my ‘stupid shoes’, leaving them beside the couch. When she came back, she was fully undressed too. We didn’t waste time appreciating each other. She licked a line from my shoulder up my throat, her mouth pausing for a moment on the scar from my bite mark. She didn’t question it yet, and instead continued her trail, ending with a nibble on my ear, then a kiss on my mouth. The fire hadn’t been dampened by her short little trip to the bathroom.
Only moments passed before I trapped her underneath me, liking the control-position. Her arms linked almost lazily over my neck, her knees tightened against my hips as I thrust downward into her the first time. She groaned, biting down into my shoulder, making sexy little grunting noises into my ear.
Afterwards, she curled up against my side for a few minutes, her index fingers tracing patterns against my stomach. The smell of her after sex was even more incredible, if that was even possible. The moon was casting a glow across the room as I ran my fingers through her hair.
"What is this?" She asked, stopping the pattern tracing, to examine my neck.
"Bite mark. I was bit by a...dog, when I was younger."
"Oh. Weird place for a dog bite." She sat up, the sheets still held tight across her chest. "You want to go get something to eat? On me."
I glanced over at the clock. "It’s kind of late. I should get going."
"...Am I ever going to see you again?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.
I smiled, pressing a kiss to her lips. "You’ll see me again. Trust me."
Not long after I had left Jade, I felt the pangs of feed pelting the back of my mind. As soon as I was far enough away from Jade’s flat, I found one of the few people still out in the sleepy little town. A drunk who had just stumbled out of one of the many local bars. I had seen him before, from afar. He would circulate the bars, getting kicked out of each one nightly. It wasn’t hard to lead him down the alley, and then suck him dry. My jaw twitched afterwards, and I made my way into the bar for one more unknowing victim before the sunrise.
As I promised, Jade and I continued to see a lot of one another. Every evening, I would feed on the vile patrons of local seedy pubs, then meet Jade, sweet Jade, at our favorite place. I spend a few hours with her, talking or making love. I say that because that’s what it was. I may have been a soulless demon, but I can honestly say that I loved her, human or not. Afterwards, I would find another victim, disposing of the body in an alley way. I was getting sloppy with my feedings -leaving bodies in plane sight. I wanted them found. I wanted the town in panic. I wanted to suck the entire town dry until it was me and Jade...and then turn her, so I could have her with me for always.
It was about a month or so after I had met Jade, and we had begun our nightly rituals that I was caught for the first time by a police officer. I had just sank my teeth into the throat of a drunk teenaged girl, whose whimpers were like music to my ears. He pulled a gun on me, and I laughed, dropping her still twitching body.
"Go ahead, fat man. Shoot me." I smiled maliciously. "It’ll hurt, but it’s not going to stop me." I licked the taste of the girl’s blood from my mouth, savoring it for a moment as she scampered away on her hands and knees, clutching her throat, the blood seeping through her fingers. She would be the first survivor. The police officer however, wasn’t so lucky.
I clutched his skull between my hands. "I’ll make this quick and painless..." His eyes widened.
"No, please...I have a family...a wife, two kids...please." The begging only made me hunger for his death more. I smiled.
"They’ll be joining you soon enough, I’m sure." A quick twist, and loud crack, and he slumped to the ground, and I made my way to Jade’s place, the adrenalin still rushing through me.
I knocked before opening the door. "Jade? You here?"
"In the bedroom, Jack." She called. "There’s stuff in the fridge if you’re hungry."
"No thanks, I just ate." I leaned in the doorway of her bedroom. "So, what are we doing tonight, love? Playful banter? Watching the telly? Or are we going to shake the house down again?"
Jade smiled. "I can’t tonight. I have homework."
I raised an eyebrow.
"Classes started today... Remember? I told you a couple of days ago...I’m taking classes at the University of Boston."
"Oh...right, right. Sorry, I forgot." I sighed, entering the bedroom, and sitting on the edge of the bed. "So...you’re working on this for...a long time?"
"Probably. Sorry, it’s totally lame." She sighed. "Maybe tomorrow we can do something? Go to the movies?"
"Sure. It would be a nice change." I nodded.
Jade was quiet for a moment. "So...do you want to go to an early show? Or a late show?"
I stretched out on the empty side of the bed, beside her. "What kind of early are we talking about here?"
"Like...one?"
"I can’t." I shook my head.
Jade sighed, looking at me. "Jack...are you afraid to be seen with me during the day or something?"
"No." I smiled, shaking my head. "I...ah...I don’t like the sun."
"Oh." She nodded, and turned back to her books. "Well, how about the four o’clock show? It’s not so bright then."
"I don’t know, Jade... I really...rather avoid it."
"Jack, is there something you’re not telling me about you?" She asked. "Something...important?"
"Depends on what you think is important, love." I tilted her chin towards me, and kissed her softly.
She took a deep breath. "I think you’re hiding something from me. Either...you’re ashamed of me, or you have some kind of weird skin disease...or something else?"
I smiled. "You’ll find out in time." I kissed her again. "I better let you study. I’ll see you tomorrow. Seven-ish."
Jade nodded, and watched me go towards the bedroom door, before she stopped me again. "Jack?"
"Hm?" I turned, my hand on the doorknob, half way out of the room.
"Are you...are you some kind of a...vampire or something?"
I smiled softly and continued out of the door.
"What kind of answer is that?"
The next night, there was no movie. We spent the evening in bed, trying to find unexplored places of each other. Afterwards, Jade lay cradled in my arms.
"You didn’t answer my question last night." She turned her head up to look at me.
I smoothed the blanket across her legs, and shrugged. "What if I was?"
"I don’t know...I guess...it’s...I don’t know." Jade shrugged. "It’s something you probably want to know about -especially if you’re dating the guy whose the reason all of these people have been dying of mysterious bite wounds for the last couple of months."
I laughed. "It’s been going on a little longer then a couple of months, love. Just on here."
"How long?" She asked.
I smiled, and thought back. "How long since what? There are a lot of time frames to look at."
"How long have you...been a vampire? Been killing people?"
"First of all, I really only kill those who deserve it most, and second of all, you don’t want to know how long."
"Yes, I really do. I think I should know. I have some right to know."
I took a deep breath. "I was turned when I was twenty five, by my cousin William."
"How long ago, Jack?"
"Seventy-five years ago...or there abouts."
"You’re like...a hundred and five."
"Yea...there about." I nodded. "No where near as old as some."
"I don’t understand...how could...why would you..." Jade closed her eyes, pressing her palms against the sides of her head. "I don’t get it, Jack. Why didn’t you tell me this before? Why didn’t know? I am so stupid."
"No, no you’re not stupid. Jade, stop." I pulled her hands away from her face. "Hey, stop now." I turned her face back towards mine. "My being a vampire has nothing to do with you at all."
"Why are you here? Where you trying to...seduce me or something before you killed me?"
I sighed. "Jade, it’s not like that."
"Yes it is...you were slowly killing off the entire town before it was just me and you...and I was the last person here."
"No." I shook my head. "I care about you."
"How can you care about me, Jack? You don’t even have a soul."
"It’s possible to love someone, even without a soul."
"You’re a fucking demon... Oh my god. I’ve been screwing a demon." She froze at the realization.
"Hey, stop...Jade."
"I want you to leave. Now." She shook her head, pushing me away, pulling the sheets away as she climbed off of the bed. "Go, and don’t come back."
"You can’t keep me out."
"The hell I can’t." She shook her head. "Get out."
I nodded, and picked up my clothes in a leisurely fashion, fastening my jeans, and pulling on my boots. "You know, this kind of hysteria really doesn’t become you, Jade."
"Stop trying to talk to me, and get the hell out of my apartment." She turned away from me.
It hurt, being shoved away from her like that. I swallowed the pain, and shook my head. "Fine. I’ll go, but remember this later...I did love you...but that might not save you when the time comes."
"Get out." She hissed.
I stayed by the door for few moments after I pulled it closed behind me, my leather jacket slung over my shoulders. I could hear her moving around, probably putting guarding spells around the windows and doors, so I couldn’t gain entrance again. It was alright. I would get my chance with her eventually.
That night, I moved on to a neighboring town. I had grown sloppy, and the police were beginning to investigate, thinking the killings were due to a large animal of some kind. I was close enough to Jade, where I could still see her any time I wanted, and yet the ‘animal’ was moving on, towards the coast, which would hopefully deter any further investigation into the murders.
My new place was situated in a roomy crypt in a local cemetery that seemed to have been abandoned for the most part many years before. It was old, and hadn’t had a good mowing in a long time. It was good enough for a couple of weeks...and I would be careful for those weeks. Careful not to kill to many people, no matter how much I hungered for it, careful to show my face just enough that I looked like a tourist, not new to town. Careful that I wouldn’t be tracked.
I made my way back to the pub where I had met Jade, hoping to see her. She walked in with a group of her mystical friends, and I watched her from the back of the bar. She looked so sweet in her tight jeans, t-shirt, and red-down vest. I hungered for her, but I tried to resist the feeling. I just knew I would have the opportunity to change her soon enough, if I could just hold off on it a little while longer.
"What are you doing here?" She asked, touching my shoulder. I tried to look casual, sipping out of my beer.
"I like the beer. What’s your excuse?"
"Are you like...stalking me?"
"Hey, I was here before you even showed up, so back off, Jade." I plunked down my beer on the bar. "If anyone is stalking anyone, it’s you stalking me!"
"Excuse me?" She crossed her arms. "I’m not a vam-." My eyes widened and I shot her a look of contempt. "Vamper...you know...a flirt...ah...right. So, seriously. Why are you here? I thought you had like...moved on."
"I missed you." I shrugged. "I moved on, but I still want to see you once in awhile."
"I can’t, Jack." She shook her head. "Not right now. I can’t deal with that."
"C’mon, Jade. It wasn’t a big deal before you knew...why does it have to matter know?"
"Because! You could turn on me, and kill me in my sleep for all I know! I don’t know anything about you Jack!"
"You know I love you...that I’d do anything for you." I took her hand in mine, kissing her finger tips.
"Jack, stop...no. That’s not fair." She pulled her hands away. "You know I can’t say no to that..."
I smiled, pulling her closer to myself, my hand around her hips. I kissed her softly, savoring the flavor of her lips for a moment. "Let me buy you a drink, hm?"
"No, I should be getting home. I have class in the morning."
"You just got here." I pushed a lock of her hair behind her ear, and kissing her again. "Come on...one drink."
"No, really, I can’t. I’m here with friends."
"You mean those people that disappear the moment you stepped into the bar?" I whispered in her ear. "I know they’re not real, sweet heart."
"I still have class in the morning."
"Then why are you still standing here?" I asked.
"I seem to be frozen in this spot..." She looked down at her feet.
"Let me walk you home, then?"
It took her a moment, but she finally nodded. "Sure. You can walk me home...but you can’t come in."
"Then why don’t you come with me to my place?" I offered.
Jade raised an eyebrow.
"Alright, so maybe that isn’t such a hot idea. How about getting a motel room with me?"
"No." She smiled, shaking her head.
"Alright, alright... C’mon. Let me walk you."
I was unaware at the time that Jade was secretly doing research, not only on me and my history as a vampire, but on vampires cursed with souls. I didn’t know yet that she wanted to return my soul to me. After she had read about my sprees across Europe, and my short time with Spike, she had become almost obsessed with returning me to human-state. She didn’t want me cursed, she wanted me to be whole again...to be able to resist the temptation of blood-lusting, and no longer thirst for the throats of innocents.
It was a long time, and four moves to various towns in the same approximate area of Massachusetts, until I found out what she was planning...and when I found out, it was much to late.
Jade had gone mad. Absolutely batty. I arrived at her apartment with a bottle of wine, and bag of take out. She had smiled at me, and invited me inside.
"I brought food."
"Oh, leave it on the counter. I want to show you something."
"...You already tried that ploy to get me to sleep with you, so this must be something else...what’s up?"
Jade laughed. "Come into the living room, and sit down."
"...Okay. Is this going to be something kinky?" I asked, sitting down on one of the satin pillows situated in the circle on the floor.
"...I don’t know...do you want it to be?" She asked. "I’ve got a pair of cuffs in the bedroom, but I was just gonna use rope..."
"What’s going on?" I asked.
"I need your help with something...with a spell."
"Excuse me? Jade, I can’t...I mean, what are you trying to do?"
"Can’t you just trust me?" She asked, sighing.
"What is this about?" I asked, trying to move away as she began to wrap the thick rope around my hands, behind my back. "Jade?"
"Just...sit and be quiet for a little while, alright? It shouldn’t take long."
"Jade, tell me what’s going on." I glared down on her as she moved, wrapping more of the same rope around my ankles. "Jade..."
"Would you please relax, Jack?" She requested, with a sigh, moving away from where I was bound, to get her supplies from the shelves around the room, situating it all in a circle. It was the perfectly round crystal ball, that glowed slightly in her hands that really clued me into what she was up to.
"Jade...what you’re doing...it’s not right."
"Jack, if you aren’t going to be quiet, I will silence you forever." Her voice was low, and serious. Her pupils were dilated, and I tried to struggle from the binds, but they were to tight.
"C’mon...let me go, and we’ll have dinner, have a drink. Please, let me go."
"No." She sat down on the pillow opposite of mine. "I will let you go as soon as I am finished, and no sooner. Now please...sit there, and be silent."
"Jade...what if something goes wrong?" I wasn’t going to just sit there and be quiet while the (possible) love of my life tried to curse me.
"Look, this isn’t what you think it is, okay?" She sighed.
"You’re trying to put a gypsy curse on me! I’ve seen it done!"
"No, I’m not!"
"So you’re not trying to re-instate my soul?"
Jade looked away, lighting the candles.
"Jade! Look, you can’t do this. I won’t let you do this."
"I have to! I can’t live seeing you like this anymore! I want a boyfriend who can go out with me during the day, I want a boyfriend who doesn’t have to suck people dry to survive. I want a boyfriend I can trust not to kill me in my sleep."
"I would never kill you in your sleep." It would be way to difficult to change her that way.
"But I can’t know that, Jack. I love you. I have to do this for us...alright?"
I was quiet then, still struggling to loosen the rope to free at least my hands.
I wasn’t paying attention to the words of Jade’s spell, not that I would have remembered them anyway. I wasn’t snapped back into the real world until I felt like my chest was being ripped open, and Jade started screaming, slumping over, her body twitching.
"Jade!" I tried to ignore my own pain, pulling harder at the restraints on my wrists. I felt the shedding of my old ways, suddenly much more human...docile then I had been before. More like the way I had been before Spike’s selfishness, of turning me.
And I had never thought that before...that Spike had been selfish in turning me. I had looked at it as a gift...but for that instant, as I watched helplessly as Jade died, trying to save me from a fate of evil, I felt that being a vampire had been a demonic curse.
When I was finally able to cut myself from my bindings, Jade was already gone, not that there had been anything I could have done anyway. I threw away the sliced ropes, and called the appropriate people. I was sitting at the kitchen table, tearing apart a piece of bread on a plate when the coroner’s office knocked on the door.
"Where’s the body?" The man’s voice seemed cold, and unfeeling, but I suppose in that profession you have to be a little harder then usual.
"Do you know what happened?" The second man asked.
"I don’t know." I shook my head. "I got here a little after seven with dinner...she was acting kind of strange. She was heavy into the wicca thing." I shrugged. "She must have taken it to far. She just collapsed."
I watched as they bagged her, and loaded her up onto the cart. The younger of the two, turned as a last thought.
"I’m really very sorry for your loss. I grew up with Jade. She was a great girl...but she depended on magic a little to much." He looked sad for a moment, giving me a weak smile, before pulling the door quietly closed behind him.
A few hours later, I was still in Jade’s apartment, just sitting on the couch, looking around. I almost didn’t notice the knocking on the door. I forced myself up from the couch, opening the door slowly.
"I’m sorry, Jade’s not here." I said, automatically, not recognizing the girl standing there. She was probably only about seventeen, and was flanked by two other vampires, and a set of werewolves. I could smell it on them. I moved in a defensive kind of mode.
The girl sent looks to the men behind her, and they stepped back, wordlessly.
"I’m not looking for...Jade, was it?" She shook her head. "I’m looking for you..."
And it was the first time I was ever introduced to the Protector -the one girl, in all the world, whose job it was to protect me, and my kind. Vampires with souls, and werewolves. She was spunky, wise...totally in love with one of the others, Damian. But I liked her. I agreed to join her Circle, even though I didn’t know many of the ropes in the gig, but I learned.
And I learned enough, that when Devon came around, I was the one who found her, along with Angel (who I had caught up with after I made my way to Sunnydale, California), and of course Gabriel...but we don’t talk about him very much anymore.
I’ll admit that I’m in love with Devon...but she loves me too. Sometimes, I still find myself missing Jade, but I know that she gave up a lot to try and make me whole again. Her entire dream didn’t get to come true. I still can’t go out in the sun, but holy water and crosses don’t bother me as much, and I can eat garlic with only a twinge of discomfort. Everyday, I thank her for her courage...to give up her own life, to save mine, even if that was originally her plan.
Sunday, August 21, 2005
Devon the Protector: A BtVS Fic (sort of)
Title: Devon the Protector
Rating: Depends on my mood.
Summary: Devon has been chosen as the protector of the Changed Ones (that means Vampires and werewolves, and the like...), and must battle the Slayer should Buffy slay one of the soul-ridden Vampires, or redeemed werewolves.
A/N: Think of this as...an AU. I’m just borrowing characters from the Buffy Universe so that I may manipulate them in my own twisted little ways... That and I just really wanted to use the Angel character. He is -so- cute. This was originally going to be an original story, and then I thought...what they heck. -This is in no means Series related. It doesn’t fit in anywhere, and I’m just making up a time period in my head... Go me! Oh! P.S. I picture "Jack" as looking kind of like Spike. And Gabriel...think Hugh Jackmen in Van Helsing -only a little more modern. Oh, and this is not yet posted anywhere else, I am not finished with it yet.
Chapter One. Protector.
The door opened quietly and Devon Cary closed it with a soft click. Her sneakers made little sound against the hard wood floor of her bedroom room. Her soft brown hair covered her face. She spoke aloud to a seemingly empty room.
"What are you doing here?" She asked, flicking on the tall lamp in the corner. The girl didn’t need to look to see the fashionably attired, dark and broodingly handsome male on her bed shy away from the light.
"I think you know what I’m doing here." He said. "Could you shut that light off?"
"Just let me get this set back up." She motioned to her computer bag near her feet. "Then I’ll turn it off."
The male watched quietly as she plugged cords into sockets, and ports. After a few moments of peaceful silence he spoke up again.
"How did you know I was here?"
"Gabriel, Gabriel... I left the tank light on." She smiled, nodding towards the fish tank as she flicked off the lamp. Moonlight bathed her bedroom in a pale glow, and she crossed her arms over her chest to stare at him.
"Oh yes. Always the eye for detail, you have." He nodded, watching her, wanting her.
"You wanted to talk?"
"I’ve missed you." Gabriel saw her tug her shorts down over her hips, the long t-shirt banishing away and hopes of a glimpse of what was under them. "Where have you been all these nights?"
"Where do you think?" Devon asked.
"Ah, right...Stupid question."
Devon pushed past him onto the bed, "Are you staying, or do you have other things to do?"
Gabriel was quiet as Devon shifted under the covers, and he leaned down to kiss her softly on the lips. "I can’t. I just wanted to know how you were... check in, and all."
"Gabriel..." Devon held onto the sleeve of his leather jacket for an extra moment. "Do me a favor?"
"What is it, love?" He asked, brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear.
"If you see Jack tonight...tell him to call, or stop by. Please?"
Gabriel pressed another kiss to her lips, and nodded, "If I see him, I’ll tell him."
Devon turned onto her shoulder as Gabriel disappeared, a slightly hopeful smiled on her lips.
Her dreams were uneasy, as they often had been since she had become the Protector. She dreamt mostly of the demise of her Werewolf wards, as they were the easier targets, but once in awhile, her favorites -her soul ridden vampires were killed mercilessly by that bitch -the Slayer. Of course, as long as those closest to her were safe, the Slayer would live on. She knew not what she did, how much it hurt every time one of her redeemed died, how someone else besides the creature felt it -how she would scream in terror and pain on the shoulder one of those in her Circle. The slayer didn’t know how she wept for those she lost...and she had lost many. Many more then she should have had to.
Devon was awoken the next morning by sunlight streaming into her room. She yawned and turned over, her hand finding knee of the man who had joined her in bed.
"Good morning." The voice was cool, but kind.
"Jack...you can’t be here." Devon smiled.
"Sure I can, my sweet. The sun is well guarded by those curtains, and even then, your windows are covered in ash. I’m fine." Jack was a stunning blonde who made the tight pants, purple silk shirt, and dusty leather trench coat he wore look good.
"Thank you for coming, but-." Devon shook her head.
"I know, I know." Jack smiled. "Gabriel said you wanted to see me."
"I just wanted to know how you were. I haven’t seen so many of you in such a long time...but, I didn’t feel anything..." She shook her head.
"Ah, so you wanted to catch up with your charge. It’s a good thing you’re only Protector of the demons who have redeemed themselves -or gained their souls back..."
Devon gave a soft smile, and pressed a kiss to Jack’s cheek. "I’m sorry. I have to get up... I have to go to school...do the whole normal-teen thing."
"I understand." Jack nodded. "Is it alright if I crash around here today?"
"No, of course not. Just...stay out of trouble. I’ll see you when I get home." She gave him another kiss before setting off to prepare for the day ahead.
Not so far away, Buffy Summers was having a conversation with her watcher, Rupert Giles. Giles had just made a new discovery in one of the old Watcher Diaries.
"It says here that there is a Protector." Giles slid his glasses farther up his nose. "A girl who protects the Changed Ones."
"Changed ones?" Buffy asked. "What is that supposed to mean?"
"Vampires, and Werewolves mostly." Giles gave a shrug. "Think of her as your counter part. She is the Protector, you are the slayer. The yang to your ying."
Buffy raised an eyebrow.
"Anyway, I don’t think you really need to worry about her...so long as you don’t kill anyone in her Circle."
"Circle?" Buffy asked. "How do I know if they are in her circle or not?"
"She is only the Protector of those Changed Ones who have...redeemed themselves, or had their souls reinstated. Her circle consists of five, usually men...Three vampires, and two werewolves. The werewolves, we don’t need to worry about, but the vampires...you do have a knack for getting a job done when it comes to them."
"Three vampires? And I thought having one was weird. -And how many redeemed vampires and werewolves could there be?"
"The Protector isn’t really a normal girl, Buffy." Giles slid the book over to her, ignoring her other question.
"Whoa! This isn’t a circle, it’s a harem!" Buffy pushed the book away.
"The thing is, anyway, is that these vampires have their souls intact."
"Like Angel?"
"Like Angel...sort of." Giles confirmed. "I’m hoping he could lead us to this girl. Or tell us more about her. Chances are, he is in contact with her, being that he is redeemed."
"You want to know about her so that we don’t piss her off, right?"
"In a sense, yes."
Each girl lived in the dark about the close existence of the other. Until they were brought together by unlikely circumstances.
Later, the same afternoon, the two were called into the office of Principal Snyder.
"Once again, I find myself in front of two, seemingly harmless, girls...who seem to be the worst of the whole bunch." Snyder sat on the edge of his desk in front of the pretty blonde and equally pretty brunette. "Both of you have unexcused absences, tardies, cutting classes, and of course...there is always the morbid little pasts you both have... Buffy with your pyromania, and Devon...with your escapades at the Institution."
Buffy almost didn’t see the soft smile that crossed Devon’s lips at the mention of the Institution.
"So, I’m putting the two of you in charge of Publicity for the school play. Here are the envelopes with everything you need." He handed a large manila envelope to each girl. "I’m sure you’ll get plenty done if you start...tonight."
"Principal Snyder, I really don’t think-." Buffy started.
"Don’t start Summers." Synder stopped her. "You and Miss Cary will make the time. You will make posters, publish an article in the newspapers, make calls for sponsors, create a program, and of course, do interviews with the cast."
Buffy nodded gravely.
"And if we don’t?" Devon asked.
"Then I’ll have no choice but to expell you, Cary. This is your last chance to save yourself."
The two were dismissed shortly afterward, and walked down the hall together. Devon turned to Buffy as they neared the end of the hall and would part ways.
"Are you busy tonight?" She asked. "I’ve got some time, right after school. I’ve got all of the supplies we need at home, and some great computer software for the programs."
"Well, actually, I kind of have this thing..." Buffy started.
"Even if it’s just for an hour or so, Buffy. I have a life too." Devon tucked a lock of her hair behind her hear. "This is my address. Stop by after school. I’ll be home until about six thirty or so."
Buffy took the slip of paper Devon handed to her before watching the other girl walk down the hall the opposite direction, soon joined by two unrecognizable boys.
Devon hadn’t been in the kitchen long before there was an almost hesitant knock on her door.
"Hi. I didn’t expect you so early." Devon ushered Buffy into the house. "Can I get you something to eat? To drink?"
"No, I’m fine. Lets just get started." Buffy shrugged. "Where are we working?"
"Well, the supplies are up in my room. We can work in the garage though. Could you help me carry the stuff down?"
"Yea, sure." Buffy nodded.
"Okay, it’s this way." Devon lead her up a flight of stairs, and watched her unlock the thick wooden door. "My Mom is kind of a snoop...I lock it during the day... Oh, my god." She jumped at the sight of Jack, still lounging on her bed, reading a book.
"What’s the matter?" Buffy reached instinctively into her jacket for her ever-ready stake.
"Nothing...I just...Oh, Jack. I forgot you were here."
"Well, it’s nice to see you too, my sweet." Jack looked up. "And you’ve brought a friend... Hello."
"Hi." Buffy shoved her hands into her pockets. "...Do I...do I know you?"
Jack examined her, "I don’t think so, but...It’s lovely meeting you. What’s the matter, dearest?" He turned to Devon who was pulling items out of her closet.
"Nothing Jack...just, go back to reading." Devon held out a box of paints for Buffy to hold onto, while she grabbed a stack of poster board, and markers. "I’ll be back up in awhile."
"Don’t be to long, Dev." Jack winked at her, and gave a Buffy a warm smile. "I’ve been trapped away in here all day waiting for her to come and see me...but no...no more cutting classes for my little prot-...protégé."
"Protégé?" Buffy asked.
"Jack is an...artist." Devon lied. "He’s my...mentor."
"Yes...simply brilliant she is." Jack smiled at her. "Take your time, darling. I’m not going anywhere."
"Um, lets...go." Devon pushed Buffy out of her room.
"Are you really going to leave him sitting in there?" Buffy asked.
"Oh, he’s used to it. He likes to lurk around." Devon shrugged, leading the way down the stairs, and into the meticulously clean garage. "My Dad has a compulsive disorder. Don’t let the cleanness freak you out or anything."
"No...of course not." Buffy set the box of paints and brushes down on the table in the center of the garage, and looked around. "You have a really nice house."
"Thank you."
"Have you always lived in Sunnydale?"
"No, we just moved here a year ago. My Mom got transferred here, and my Dad works from home, mostly. Getting this house was kind of a pinch of luck."
The two worked quietly for a while, before Buffy noticed the sun starting to go down.
"I should get going. Can we work on this again tomorrow?"
"Sure, of course. Just come over. I’m here until about...now, actually. Wow, I can’t believe we worked that long." Devon looked down at her watch. "It’s almost six thirty."
"Do you have a job or something?" Buffy asked.
"...Sort of. Something like that. I better go grab Jack before he goes out of his mind, bored in my room. Just leave the brushes in the sink, and I’ll clean them before I go. I’ll see you tomorrow, Buffy." Devon didn’t bother to see her out before disappearing back into the house.
Buffy cleaned out the brushes in the sink, setting them to dry on the side, and then exited the house, quietly as possible.
"Jack...No, c’mon...We have to find Gabriel and Angel... And Joshua and Kerwin." Devon laughed as she felt Jack’s tongue against her throat. "Seriously now..."
"Okay, okay..." Jack sighed. "Lets go find Gabriel and Angel, and those two little...werewolves you keep around."
"I have to keep them around..." Devon pressed a kiss to his lips. "It’s part of being the Protector."
"Oh...right." Jack sighed, rolling his eyes. "Lets go, my sweet." He put an arm around her waist,
and lead her out of her bedroom, which clicked, locked, behind them.
Finding Gabriel was easy enough. He as waiting outside for them, leaning against a fence post in Devon’s yard. Not far behind him, were the two werewolves she kept as part of her circle -the crowd she could ‘hang out’ with at school -Joshua and Kerwin.
"Do either of you know where Angel is? I haven’t seen him in such a long time." Devon had a vampire on either side of her, linking arms, while her two werewolf lackeys brought up the rear.
"Last I saw him, he was lurking about in the graveyard... He does that lot." Gabriel sighed. "He hangs out with the Slayer you know."
"Do you know anything about the Slayer?" Devon asked.
"Only that Angel fancies her...or did fancy her at one point." Gabriel shrugged. "I think they’ve gotten over it now...since he got his soul back the second time, and we all thought he was gone."
Devon groaned, remembering the pain, and the outrage that had overwhelmed her...then to have Angel return. Angel had been part of her circle since she had become to the Protector.
"I’m sorry, love... Have I dredged up awful memories for you?" Gabriel asked, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear.
"It’s alright, Gabriel. I just want to check on Angel...and perhaps venture out for a new ward...I’ve felt...a presence... I’m not sure who it is yet...but...someone new is out there."
"Alright, my sweet. We’ll find Angel." Jack grinned. "And have a wicked way with him before retiring again..." Jack paused to give her a hungry kiss, and sobering enough to feel Gabriel’s jealous glare. "Just because she takes to me more then she takes to you doesn’t mean you have to go all...hell-fire on me."
"I don’t fancy any of you above the others." Devon smiled at Gabriel. "And you shouldn’t favor at all." She pressed a kiss to his cheek. "C’ mon, lets check out the Graveyard." She slid from their arms, and stepped up her pace.
A little ways away, in front of an unmarked tombstone, Angel and Buffy spoke.
"What do you know about the Protector?" Buffy asked, her arms crossed.
"What about the Protector? You’re not thinking about going after her or anything are you? She’s on your side..." Angel shook his head. "Just...don’t piss her off."
"Giles just read some things on her... We figured we should know more about her."
"She’s a sweet girl... She’s picked her circle well...well, the vampire side of the circle anyway. The werewolves are really just lackey’s who follow us around..."
"Us?"
"I...I’m the third vampire." Angel told her, shaking his head. "I thought you knew."
"No, I had no idea."
"How much do you know?"
"Just that she’s a girl, she protects the ‘Changed Ones’ who have redeemed themselves or had their souls reinstated. She has a circle of five men...three vampires, and two werewolves."
"Then you don’t know who the others are?"
"No...should I?"
"Okay...Maybe it’s time for the two of you meet?" Angel raised his eyebrow. "She can help you...so you don’t kill any innocents...and it hurts her like hell every time you do."
"She...she feels them?"
"She feels our pain...when we suffer... To her, we’re innocents. When we expire, she feels everything we go through -she endures our pain, our sorrows...everything."
"Oh god... I’ve really pissed this girl off, haven’t I?"
"It hurts more when it’s part of her circle...so you’ve really only pissed her off once." Angel shrugged.
"But you’re okay..."
"So she’s okay."
"Who is she?" Buffy asked.
"Angel?" Gabriel stepped out of a group of shrubbery. "Oh, sorry...I didn’t realize you were with someone."
"It’s alright, Gabe. What’s the matter?" Angel asked.
"Dev, she’s looking for you." Gabriel motioned behind him with a jerk of his head. "She’s been worried."
"Why don’t you bring her here? I think there’s someone she needs to meet." Angel looked down at Buffy.
"Right then." Gabriel nodded. "I’ll go get her and the others."
Once Gabriel was gone, Buffy became self conscious.
"Do I look okay?"
"You look fine. She’s not going to hurt you." Angel smiled. "You’re with me..."
"Right." Buffy nodded, tilting back on her heels. "So...who is this girl, anyway? What’s her name?"
"...Buffy?"
Buffy turned, taking in the sight of Devon, flanked closely by Gabriel and Jack, as well as the two unrecognizable guys she had seen earlier in the day. "Devon? You’re the Protector?"
"You’re the Slayer?"
"You two know each other, then?" Angel asked.
"We got stuck doing a...thing together, from Snyder." Buffy shook her head. "Wh...how? When?" She stared at Devon.
"I should be asking you the same." Devon crossed her arms. "I suppose this makes a lot of sense to me now."
"Yea, it really does." Buffy nodded. "But...Angel, I don’t understand. How can you be part of the Circle?"
"What do you mean?" Angel asked, moving to slid an arm around Devon’s waist. "Is it really that hard to grasp? Devon is the protector...I’m part of the Circle."
"But...the Circle...you guys like...do...stuff...together..."
Angel laughed, "Not the kind of stuff you’re thinking. Devon is still in High school, Buffy."
"So?" Buffy shrugged.
"I don’t sleep with every high school girl I come across, Buffy... That came out wrong." Angel stopped her. "What I mean is that... Oh...shit."
"What he means...is that he’s only third in line." Gabriel smiled. "He doesn’t get a go with the Protector until she turns eighteen..."
"Is that good or bad?" Buffy asked. "This is all really hard to grasp....and I really don’t want to think about anyone doing it."
"It’s not as weird as they’re making it sound..." Devon pushed Jack off of her arm. "The Protectors before me have always been older...and wiser... Sleeping with the members of the circle insures my safety and immunity. When I turned sixteen, it was Jack, the first, seventeen, Gabriel, and when I turn eighteen, Angel. ...And so on..."
"And when you’ve used all of the five?"
"Then I sleep with who ever I want." Devon shrugged. "I think that’s how it goes, anyway... And it’s only once a year... This doesn’t sound good at all does it?"
"No, my sweet, it doesn’t. You sound like a common little whore, don’t you?" Jack smiled maliciously.
"Jack." Angel put a hand on the blonde’s shoulder. "Don’t." He felt Jack move back under his hand.
"Sorry, Angel. Old habits die hard and all that."
"So...you’re the Protector... I’m the Slayer...and as long as I don’t kill any of the five in your circle, you don’t have to kill me?"
"Something like that." Devon nodded. "Try and stay away from the other soul-infested, and redeemed... I won’t have to retaliate for them, but it hurts like a bitch every time one of them dies."
"I’ll try my best." Buffy nodded. "I don’t kill your guys, you don’t kill my guys, and we all...live." She held out her hand, which Devon hesitantly shook. Buffy had just released her hand when the streak of pain shot up her arm. She groaned, falling into Jack’s arms.
"Oh, fuck..." Jack sighed. "We better get her home...Gabriel, go on ahead of us... You two...go home." He dismissed the lackeys with a wave of his hand, and then allowed Angel to lift the shaking Devon into his arms.
"What’s going on?"
"Someone is dying. It looks like it’s going fast. I better get her home. I’ll see you, Buffy. -Remember, no one can know about the Protector."
"Of course not." Buffy shook her head.
"Not even your friends, and Giles can know that you know her identity. Not yet."
"Alright." Buffy nodded, and watched Angel and Jack retreat, Devon’s body still quivering helplessly in their arms.
Rating: Depends on my mood.
Summary: Devon has been chosen as the protector of the Changed Ones (that means Vampires and werewolves, and the like...), and must battle the Slayer should Buffy slay one of the soul-ridden Vampires, or redeemed werewolves.
A/N: Think of this as...an AU. I’m just borrowing characters from the Buffy Universe so that I may manipulate them in my own twisted little ways... That and I just really wanted to use the Angel character. He is -so- cute. This was originally going to be an original story, and then I thought...what they heck. -This is in no means Series related. It doesn’t fit in anywhere, and I’m just making up a time period in my head... Go me! Oh! P.S. I picture "Jack" as looking kind of like Spike. And Gabriel...think Hugh Jackmen in Van Helsing -only a little more modern. Oh, and this is not yet posted anywhere else, I am not finished with it yet.
Chapter One. Protector.
The door opened quietly and Devon Cary closed it with a soft click. Her sneakers made little sound against the hard wood floor of her bedroom room. Her soft brown hair covered her face. She spoke aloud to a seemingly empty room.
"What are you doing here?" She asked, flicking on the tall lamp in the corner. The girl didn’t need to look to see the fashionably attired, dark and broodingly handsome male on her bed shy away from the light.
"I think you know what I’m doing here." He said. "Could you shut that light off?"
"Just let me get this set back up." She motioned to her computer bag near her feet. "Then I’ll turn it off."
The male watched quietly as she plugged cords into sockets, and ports. After a few moments of peaceful silence he spoke up again.
"How did you know I was here?"
"Gabriel, Gabriel... I left the tank light on." She smiled, nodding towards the fish tank as she flicked off the lamp. Moonlight bathed her bedroom in a pale glow, and she crossed her arms over her chest to stare at him.
"Oh yes. Always the eye for detail, you have." He nodded, watching her, wanting her.
"You wanted to talk?"
"I’ve missed you." Gabriel saw her tug her shorts down over her hips, the long t-shirt banishing away and hopes of a glimpse of what was under them. "Where have you been all these nights?"
"Where do you think?" Devon asked.
"Ah, right...Stupid question."
Devon pushed past him onto the bed, "Are you staying, or do you have other things to do?"
Gabriel was quiet as Devon shifted under the covers, and he leaned down to kiss her softly on the lips. "I can’t. I just wanted to know how you were... check in, and all."
"Gabriel..." Devon held onto the sleeve of his leather jacket for an extra moment. "Do me a favor?"
"What is it, love?" He asked, brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear.
"If you see Jack tonight...tell him to call, or stop by. Please?"
Gabriel pressed another kiss to her lips, and nodded, "If I see him, I’ll tell him."
Devon turned onto her shoulder as Gabriel disappeared, a slightly hopeful smiled on her lips.
Her dreams were uneasy, as they often had been since she had become the Protector. She dreamt mostly of the demise of her Werewolf wards, as they were the easier targets, but once in awhile, her favorites -her soul ridden vampires were killed mercilessly by that bitch -the Slayer. Of course, as long as those closest to her were safe, the Slayer would live on. She knew not what she did, how much it hurt every time one of her redeemed died, how someone else besides the creature felt it -how she would scream in terror and pain on the shoulder one of those in her Circle. The slayer didn’t know how she wept for those she lost...and she had lost many. Many more then she should have had to.
Devon was awoken the next morning by sunlight streaming into her room. She yawned and turned over, her hand finding knee of the man who had joined her in bed.
"Good morning." The voice was cool, but kind.
"Jack...you can’t be here." Devon smiled.
"Sure I can, my sweet. The sun is well guarded by those curtains, and even then, your windows are covered in ash. I’m fine." Jack was a stunning blonde who made the tight pants, purple silk shirt, and dusty leather trench coat he wore look good.
"Thank you for coming, but-." Devon shook her head.
"I know, I know." Jack smiled. "Gabriel said you wanted to see me."
"I just wanted to know how you were. I haven’t seen so many of you in such a long time...but, I didn’t feel anything..." She shook her head.
"Ah, so you wanted to catch up with your charge. It’s a good thing you’re only Protector of the demons who have redeemed themselves -or gained their souls back..."
Devon gave a soft smile, and pressed a kiss to Jack’s cheek. "I’m sorry. I have to get up... I have to go to school...do the whole normal-teen thing."
"I understand." Jack nodded. "Is it alright if I crash around here today?"
"No, of course not. Just...stay out of trouble. I’ll see you when I get home." She gave him another kiss before setting off to prepare for the day ahead.
Not so far away, Buffy Summers was having a conversation with her watcher, Rupert Giles. Giles had just made a new discovery in one of the old Watcher Diaries.
"It says here that there is a Protector." Giles slid his glasses farther up his nose. "A girl who protects the Changed Ones."
"Changed ones?" Buffy asked. "What is that supposed to mean?"
"Vampires, and Werewolves mostly." Giles gave a shrug. "Think of her as your counter part. She is the Protector, you are the slayer. The yang to your ying."
Buffy raised an eyebrow.
"Anyway, I don’t think you really need to worry about her...so long as you don’t kill anyone in her Circle."
"Circle?" Buffy asked. "How do I know if they are in her circle or not?"
"She is only the Protector of those Changed Ones who have...redeemed themselves, or had their souls reinstated. Her circle consists of five, usually men...Three vampires, and two werewolves. The werewolves, we don’t need to worry about, but the vampires...you do have a knack for getting a job done when it comes to them."
"Three vampires? And I thought having one was weird. -And how many redeemed vampires and werewolves could there be?"
"The Protector isn’t really a normal girl, Buffy." Giles slid the book over to her, ignoring her other question.
"Whoa! This isn’t a circle, it’s a harem!" Buffy pushed the book away.
"The thing is, anyway, is that these vampires have their souls intact."
"Like Angel?"
"Like Angel...sort of." Giles confirmed. "I’m hoping he could lead us to this girl. Or tell us more about her. Chances are, he is in contact with her, being that he is redeemed."
"You want to know about her so that we don’t piss her off, right?"
"In a sense, yes."
Each girl lived in the dark about the close existence of the other. Until they were brought together by unlikely circumstances.
Later, the same afternoon, the two were called into the office of Principal Snyder.
"Once again, I find myself in front of two, seemingly harmless, girls...who seem to be the worst of the whole bunch." Snyder sat on the edge of his desk in front of the pretty blonde and equally pretty brunette. "Both of you have unexcused absences, tardies, cutting classes, and of course...there is always the morbid little pasts you both have... Buffy with your pyromania, and Devon...with your escapades at the Institution."
Buffy almost didn’t see the soft smile that crossed Devon’s lips at the mention of the Institution.
"So, I’m putting the two of you in charge of Publicity for the school play. Here are the envelopes with everything you need." He handed a large manila envelope to each girl. "I’m sure you’ll get plenty done if you start...tonight."
"Principal Snyder, I really don’t think-." Buffy started.
"Don’t start Summers." Synder stopped her. "You and Miss Cary will make the time. You will make posters, publish an article in the newspapers, make calls for sponsors, create a program, and of course, do interviews with the cast."
Buffy nodded gravely.
"And if we don’t?" Devon asked.
"Then I’ll have no choice but to expell you, Cary. This is your last chance to save yourself."
The two were dismissed shortly afterward, and walked down the hall together. Devon turned to Buffy as they neared the end of the hall and would part ways.
"Are you busy tonight?" She asked. "I’ve got some time, right after school. I’ve got all of the supplies we need at home, and some great computer software for the programs."
"Well, actually, I kind of have this thing..." Buffy started.
"Even if it’s just for an hour or so, Buffy. I have a life too." Devon tucked a lock of her hair behind her hear. "This is my address. Stop by after school. I’ll be home until about six thirty or so."
Buffy took the slip of paper Devon handed to her before watching the other girl walk down the hall the opposite direction, soon joined by two unrecognizable boys.
Devon hadn’t been in the kitchen long before there was an almost hesitant knock on her door.
"Hi. I didn’t expect you so early." Devon ushered Buffy into the house. "Can I get you something to eat? To drink?"
"No, I’m fine. Lets just get started." Buffy shrugged. "Where are we working?"
"Well, the supplies are up in my room. We can work in the garage though. Could you help me carry the stuff down?"
"Yea, sure." Buffy nodded.
"Okay, it’s this way." Devon lead her up a flight of stairs, and watched her unlock the thick wooden door. "My Mom is kind of a snoop...I lock it during the day... Oh, my god." She jumped at the sight of Jack, still lounging on her bed, reading a book.
"What’s the matter?" Buffy reached instinctively into her jacket for her ever-ready stake.
"Nothing...I just...Oh, Jack. I forgot you were here."
"Well, it’s nice to see you too, my sweet." Jack looked up. "And you’ve brought a friend... Hello."
"Hi." Buffy shoved her hands into her pockets. "...Do I...do I know you?"
Jack examined her, "I don’t think so, but...It’s lovely meeting you. What’s the matter, dearest?" He turned to Devon who was pulling items out of her closet.
"Nothing Jack...just, go back to reading." Devon held out a box of paints for Buffy to hold onto, while she grabbed a stack of poster board, and markers. "I’ll be back up in awhile."
"Don’t be to long, Dev." Jack winked at her, and gave a Buffy a warm smile. "I’ve been trapped away in here all day waiting for her to come and see me...but no...no more cutting classes for my little prot-...protégé."
"Protégé?" Buffy asked.
"Jack is an...artist." Devon lied. "He’s my...mentor."
"Yes...simply brilliant she is." Jack smiled at her. "Take your time, darling. I’m not going anywhere."
"Um, lets...go." Devon pushed Buffy out of her room.
"Are you really going to leave him sitting in there?" Buffy asked.
"Oh, he’s used to it. He likes to lurk around." Devon shrugged, leading the way down the stairs, and into the meticulously clean garage. "My Dad has a compulsive disorder. Don’t let the cleanness freak you out or anything."
"No...of course not." Buffy set the box of paints and brushes down on the table in the center of the garage, and looked around. "You have a really nice house."
"Thank you."
"Have you always lived in Sunnydale?"
"No, we just moved here a year ago. My Mom got transferred here, and my Dad works from home, mostly. Getting this house was kind of a pinch of luck."
The two worked quietly for a while, before Buffy noticed the sun starting to go down.
"I should get going. Can we work on this again tomorrow?"
"Sure, of course. Just come over. I’m here until about...now, actually. Wow, I can’t believe we worked that long." Devon looked down at her watch. "It’s almost six thirty."
"Do you have a job or something?" Buffy asked.
"...Sort of. Something like that. I better go grab Jack before he goes out of his mind, bored in my room. Just leave the brushes in the sink, and I’ll clean them before I go. I’ll see you tomorrow, Buffy." Devon didn’t bother to see her out before disappearing back into the house.
Buffy cleaned out the brushes in the sink, setting them to dry on the side, and then exited the house, quietly as possible.
"Jack...No, c’mon...We have to find Gabriel and Angel... And Joshua and Kerwin." Devon laughed as she felt Jack’s tongue against her throat. "Seriously now..."
"Okay, okay..." Jack sighed. "Lets go find Gabriel and Angel, and those two little...werewolves you keep around."
"I have to keep them around..." Devon pressed a kiss to his lips. "It’s part of being the Protector."
"Oh...right." Jack sighed, rolling his eyes. "Lets go, my sweet." He put an arm around her waist,
and lead her out of her bedroom, which clicked, locked, behind them.
Finding Gabriel was easy enough. He as waiting outside for them, leaning against a fence post in Devon’s yard. Not far behind him, were the two werewolves she kept as part of her circle -the crowd she could ‘hang out’ with at school -Joshua and Kerwin.
"Do either of you know where Angel is? I haven’t seen him in such a long time." Devon had a vampire on either side of her, linking arms, while her two werewolf lackeys brought up the rear.
"Last I saw him, he was lurking about in the graveyard... He does that lot." Gabriel sighed. "He hangs out with the Slayer you know."
"Do you know anything about the Slayer?" Devon asked.
"Only that Angel fancies her...or did fancy her at one point." Gabriel shrugged. "I think they’ve gotten over it now...since he got his soul back the second time, and we all thought he was gone."
Devon groaned, remembering the pain, and the outrage that had overwhelmed her...then to have Angel return. Angel had been part of her circle since she had become to the Protector.
"I’m sorry, love... Have I dredged up awful memories for you?" Gabriel asked, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear.
"It’s alright, Gabriel. I just want to check on Angel...and perhaps venture out for a new ward...I’ve felt...a presence... I’m not sure who it is yet...but...someone new is out there."
"Alright, my sweet. We’ll find Angel." Jack grinned. "And have a wicked way with him before retiring again..." Jack paused to give her a hungry kiss, and sobering enough to feel Gabriel’s jealous glare. "Just because she takes to me more then she takes to you doesn’t mean you have to go all...hell-fire on me."
"I don’t fancy any of you above the others." Devon smiled at Gabriel. "And you shouldn’t favor at all." She pressed a kiss to his cheek. "C’ mon, lets check out the Graveyard." She slid from their arms, and stepped up her pace.
A little ways away, in front of an unmarked tombstone, Angel and Buffy spoke.
"What do you know about the Protector?" Buffy asked, her arms crossed.
"What about the Protector? You’re not thinking about going after her or anything are you? She’s on your side..." Angel shook his head. "Just...don’t piss her off."
"Giles just read some things on her... We figured we should know more about her."
"She’s a sweet girl... She’s picked her circle well...well, the vampire side of the circle anyway. The werewolves are really just lackey’s who follow us around..."
"Us?"
"I...I’m the third vampire." Angel told her, shaking his head. "I thought you knew."
"No, I had no idea."
"How much do you know?"
"Just that she’s a girl, she protects the ‘Changed Ones’ who have redeemed themselves or had their souls reinstated. She has a circle of five men...three vampires, and two werewolves."
"Then you don’t know who the others are?"
"No...should I?"
"Okay...Maybe it’s time for the two of you meet?" Angel raised his eyebrow. "She can help you...so you don’t kill any innocents...and it hurts her like hell every time you do."
"She...she feels them?"
"She feels our pain...when we suffer... To her, we’re innocents. When we expire, she feels everything we go through -she endures our pain, our sorrows...everything."
"Oh god... I’ve really pissed this girl off, haven’t I?"
"It hurts more when it’s part of her circle...so you’ve really only pissed her off once." Angel shrugged.
"But you’re okay..."
"So she’s okay."
"Who is she?" Buffy asked.
"Angel?" Gabriel stepped out of a group of shrubbery. "Oh, sorry...I didn’t realize you were with someone."
"It’s alright, Gabe. What’s the matter?" Angel asked.
"Dev, she’s looking for you." Gabriel motioned behind him with a jerk of his head. "She’s been worried."
"Why don’t you bring her here? I think there’s someone she needs to meet." Angel looked down at Buffy.
"Right then." Gabriel nodded. "I’ll go get her and the others."
Once Gabriel was gone, Buffy became self conscious.
"Do I look okay?"
"You look fine. She’s not going to hurt you." Angel smiled. "You’re with me..."
"Right." Buffy nodded, tilting back on her heels. "So...who is this girl, anyway? What’s her name?"
"...Buffy?"
Buffy turned, taking in the sight of Devon, flanked closely by Gabriel and Jack, as well as the two unrecognizable guys she had seen earlier in the day. "Devon? You’re the Protector?"
"You’re the Slayer?"
"You two know each other, then?" Angel asked.
"We got stuck doing a...thing together, from Snyder." Buffy shook her head. "Wh...how? When?" She stared at Devon.
"I should be asking you the same." Devon crossed her arms. "I suppose this makes a lot of sense to me now."
"Yea, it really does." Buffy nodded. "But...Angel, I don’t understand. How can you be part of the Circle?"
"What do you mean?" Angel asked, moving to slid an arm around Devon’s waist. "Is it really that hard to grasp? Devon is the protector...I’m part of the Circle."
"But...the Circle...you guys like...do...stuff...together..."
Angel laughed, "Not the kind of stuff you’re thinking. Devon is still in High school, Buffy."
"So?" Buffy shrugged.
"I don’t sleep with every high school girl I come across, Buffy... That came out wrong." Angel stopped her. "What I mean is that... Oh...shit."
"What he means...is that he’s only third in line." Gabriel smiled. "He doesn’t get a go with the Protector until she turns eighteen..."
"Is that good or bad?" Buffy asked. "This is all really hard to grasp....and I really don’t want to think about anyone doing it."
"It’s not as weird as they’re making it sound..." Devon pushed Jack off of her arm. "The Protectors before me have always been older...and wiser... Sleeping with the members of the circle insures my safety and immunity. When I turned sixteen, it was Jack, the first, seventeen, Gabriel, and when I turn eighteen, Angel. ...And so on..."
"And when you’ve used all of the five?"
"Then I sleep with who ever I want." Devon shrugged. "I think that’s how it goes, anyway... And it’s only once a year... This doesn’t sound good at all does it?"
"No, my sweet, it doesn’t. You sound like a common little whore, don’t you?" Jack smiled maliciously.
"Jack." Angel put a hand on the blonde’s shoulder. "Don’t." He felt Jack move back under his hand.
"Sorry, Angel. Old habits die hard and all that."
"So...you’re the Protector... I’m the Slayer...and as long as I don’t kill any of the five in your circle, you don’t have to kill me?"
"Something like that." Devon nodded. "Try and stay away from the other soul-infested, and redeemed... I won’t have to retaliate for them, but it hurts like a bitch every time one of them dies."
"I’ll try my best." Buffy nodded. "I don’t kill your guys, you don’t kill my guys, and we all...live." She held out her hand, which Devon hesitantly shook. Buffy had just released her hand when the streak of pain shot up her arm. She groaned, falling into Jack’s arms.
"Oh, fuck..." Jack sighed. "We better get her home...Gabriel, go on ahead of us... You two...go home." He dismissed the lackeys with a wave of his hand, and then allowed Angel to lift the shaking Devon into his arms.
"What’s going on?"
"Someone is dying. It looks like it’s going fast. I better get her home. I’ll see you, Buffy. -Remember, no one can know about the Protector."
"Of course not." Buffy shook her head.
"Not even your friends, and Giles can know that you know her identity. Not yet."
"Alright." Buffy nodded, and watched Angel and Jack retreat, Devon’s body still quivering helplessly in their arms.
Found and Lost Chapter one
Authors Note/Disclaimer: I’m combining several ideas from the comics, the movies, the books, the original animated series, and X-Men: Evolution, as well as my own twisted ideas. Bare with me. (Mostly X-Men: Evolution, as the comic books confuse the hell out of me...but I’m learning!) This will eventually start switching POV’s for short periods of time. Watch for it. The rest of this story can be found on fanfiction.net under the title: Found and Lost
Sundry
Prologue
Joanna’s POV
Close your eyes.
What do you see?
I see doors. Thousands and thousands of doors, constantly opening and closing, shifting around in my head like a combination lock. -Just like everything else in my life; constantly changing and shifting. I never seem to be able to find a place, and a time to just be...me. I never thought I could find anyone who would understand, I thought I was alone in the world, and then I was rescued.
See, I made the mistake of telling my mom and stepfather about my powers. My stepfather, Daniel, talked my Mom into abandoning me. They drugged me, and pushed me from their moving car at sixty-five miles-an-hour into a late-November snow drift. That’s where they left me to die: in the snow, by the side of the road. To die, or be killed. I guess they didn’t realize the possibility of me being saved.
And so, that’s what happened. I kept blacking out because of my injuries, but I remember Storm’s white hair, and Cyclops’s ruby-quartz visor. I vague remember Jean Grey, carefully using her levitation power to lift me from the snow bank. I felt safer once I was inside of their plane, and I didn’t wake up again until a voice inside of my head told me it was time to.
Professor Xavier told me I was at his school for the gift -for mutants, like me. He asked me what my powers were, and I told him. All of them.
When I was through, he whistled, and leaned back in his chair, "That’s quite a sundry. I think I rather like that, don’t you?"
"Like what?" I asked.
"Sundry."
And so my ‘real’ name, my mutant name became Sundry, while my human name, Joanna Darius, was displaced for personal use.
Chapter One
When I was well enough, and my regenerative power had healed my wounds and bruises. I was given a room assignment with Rogue, who at first seemed very stand-off, and stuck up. Then I realized it was because of her power. Rogue can’t have physical contact with people. Her power is to drain people of their life-source, or in the case of mutants, she can "borrow" their powers for a short time. It’s funny because I have the same power, except with the detail that I absorb powers, and keep them. My acquired "sundry" keeps me in check when I get into contact with people. My power gives me unlimited other powers, and I’ve acquired quite a few.
One of the first things we found out is that Rogue can only borrow my ‘active’ power. For example, if I’m using a telepathic power, she can borrow it, if I don’t have an active power, she can touch me and neither of us suffers any damage, as if we were both normal people.
The first power I lusted after was Nightcrawler’s teleporting powers (or as he liked to call it, ‘bamfing"). I didn’t have to touch him long to get it, either, and it was a total accidental-on-purpose that I got it in the first place. We had been in the Danger Room, my first week at the school, and Nightcrawler (Kurt) sort of...bamfed, right on top of me. My hand barely touched his skin for ten seconds, and I had absorbed the power. He blinked at me, his head and tail-tip spinning.
"Kurt!" I asked, after he had fallen back, and I could feel the power filtering through my body. "Are you OK?"
"Oh yah! I’m fine!" He grinned at me. "How are you?"
"I’m OK." I helped him up. "Try and watch where you’re going next time."
Rogue came over to us then, her arms crossed. "Sundry...did you just absorb his power?" She seemed disappointed.
"It was an accident. I can’t help it." I shrugged.
Logan, Wolverine, tried to get us back into formation. It wasn’t until later that I got to actually try the new power. Rogue watched over my test quietly, ready to go for help in case I got stuck in a wall or something. It worked well though, and I was pleased.
After I absorbed Kurt’s power though, I started wearing gloves, just in case. I had to be careful that I didn’t absorb the wrong power.
My day’s were usually basic, normal, teen stuff. With the exception of the Danger Room training sessions. They were to come to good use, soon before I, or anyone, expected. My skills weren’t exactly up-to-par, but with my assorted powers, I could kick-ass with the best of them. Or so I found out.
Rogue, Bobby (Iceman), Kitty, and I, along with Storm (as our chaperone) were at the mall for a shoe sale (well, Bobby was along for the ride). We hadn’t been there long when I noticed Logan standing by one of the vender’s counters. I’ll be the first to admit that I have a huge crush on Logan. I mean, what’s not to like? He’s cute, charming, dangerous, and did I mention drop-dead-sexy?
As I was saying, I saw Logan. So of course, I wanted to strike up a conversation. Only...come to find out, that it wasn’t Logan. I realized this when I touched his hand as I was flirting with him, without gloves. I jolt shook up my arms, rattling me for a moment. Logan looked worried.
"Are you alright?" He asked.
"Oh, yea. I’m fine." I shook my head, flexing my fingers, and glancing over at the clock. "Oh, wow! Look at the time! I better go regroup. Why don’t you come with me?"
Logan declined, as I knew he would. I then suggested that we meet for lunch, and he agreed.
When I met up with Storm, I told her what had happened. She seemed worried, and placed a call to Professor Xavier. There was backup sent to the mall: Cyclops, Jean Grey, and the real Logan. I was hoping that they were smart enough to come in on the other entrance on the other side of the mall. Jean Grey pulled me aside when the three of them arrived. She informed me of their plan. I was to approach the fake-Logan, pretending as though I still had no idea that it wasn’t the real Logan. If I got into any trouble, they would be there to back me up.
"So in other words, I go in and flirt with this...person, and pray that I don’t get kidnaped?" I asked.
"...Sort of." She told me. "Just, act like you normally would."
Right...easier said then done.
I met ‘Logan’ at a table near the back of the food court. I made light conversation, asking him what brought him to the mall, and he asked about school. After about ten minutes, he asked me if I wanted a ride back to the school -that was the ploy he was using. He was after me.
"No, I better ride back with Storm." I motioned behind me. "It might look bad if I-."
"What? Don’t you trust me?" He grabbed my upper arm, and yanked me closer. "Are you afraid of me, Sundry?"
My eyes got large, and widened. He knew that I knew, but Cyclops and Jean were already moving closer. Wolverine was coming up from behind. He grabbed the guy first by the back of the jacket. Cyclops had his finger on the side of his goggles and an itchy trigger finger.
"Mystique." Wolverine’s hands gripped around her throat, and I tore away from her. The form of the offensive perpetrator peeled away to reveal a blue-skinned woman with short, red hair. She grinned maliciously at Wolverine, and blew him a kiss. Then she flipped out of his hands, and morphed quickly into another form as she blended in with the mall crowd.
"You alright, kid?" Logan put a hand on my shoulder.
"I’m fine." I crossed my arms, watching as Mystique disappeared.
"We’d better get you back to the manor."
"I’m not sure what it is that Magneto wants with you, Sundry." Professor Xavier was pondering. "I think it’s safe to say, however, that you should stick around the school more, and limit your outside-activities, alright?"
"Alright." I nodded. I wasn’t about to disagree. I didn’t want to see more of this Mystique woman anyway. She seemed to be very well acquainted with all of the X-Men though.
"Be careful, Joanna. It would be a shame to loose such a gifted young woman, such as yourself." Professor Xavier patted my hand before letting me go.
I ran into Logan in the hallway. He stopped me with a hand on the shoulder. "How you doing, kid?"
"I’m fine." I shrugged. I wasn’t sure if I liked all of the attention I was getting. I wanted to figure out this Magneto guy’s plan, and why he wanted me. He obviously knew that I could absorb powers, but what if that wasn’t the power he wanted? If that was the case, he could have easily gotten any of the others that I had gotten powers from. So why me? "Just confused."
"Anything I can help you out with?" He asked. He actually sounded sincere.
"No, I’ll be fine, but thanks." I smiled, and ducked into the room I shared with Rogue. She was sitting cross legged on her bed, homework spread out across in front of her.
"Hi." She smiled. "Can you help me out with this?" She looked with loathing at one of her text books.
I helped her out, my brain still on Logan. This was more then a school-girl crush, and I felt awful about that. No one had any idea how old he was, or where he came from, and yet, I felt so attracted to him. Everything about him. A man who could well be older then my Grandfather, and all I could think about since that incident at the mall, was him. Not necessarily sleeping with him, but I’ll admit that ran though my mind a lot as well.
I wasn’t ever actually alone with Logan until a few days later. Storm and Cyclops had gone on a mission while Professor Xavier and Jean were at a conference in Washington. Logan had been left to watch over the students. I was sitting in the rec room on the couch, flipping through the channels. He leaned in the doorway when I had settled on the Sunday Night Sex Talk on Oxygen.
"Interesting choice." His voice growled behind me. A blink from me, flipped to cartoons.
"I thought everyone else was asleep." I hugged a throw pillow, tucking my feet under me, while he made himself comfortable on the other side of the couch. He picked up the remote and flipped it back.
"No, really. It’s an interesting choice for a seventeen year old girl on a late Sunday night." He raised an eyebrow at me. "You watch this often?"
"Often enough that I’ve seen this episode." I blinked my eyes again and flipped through the channels again. "Something in particular you’d care to watch?"
"They can’t show what I like on television -for free anyway."
I stopped and looked at him. A smirk crossed his lips, and turned away again.
"Is there somethin’ wrong, kid?" He asked, touching my foot. His hands were warm, and kind of rough against my skin.
"No, I’m fine." I said, moving my foot away, onto the floor. "I should go to bed. Goodnight, Logan."
I was already half way out of the room when he called me back. He got up from his seat, and took my wrists in his hands. Then he tugged me closer to him, kissing me. We both savored the moment for an extra second or so.
"I shouldn’t have done that." His voice was low and raspy. "I’m supposed to be watching over you, not molesting you."
"I wasn’t complaining."He released my wrists, and took a step back from me. "I better go to bed."
"Good night, Joanna.."
"G’ night."
I saw Rogue the next morning in the kitchen, and she tapped one of her boots against the back of my leg. "What were you thinking, last night, Joanna?"
"What are you talking about?" I asked.
"You and Mr. Logan. It’s all over school."
"What?" I asked, pulling her into a corner. "What about Logan and me?"
"That you kissed him in the corridor last night when everyone was either away or asleep. What was it like?" She asked, a grin spreading across her lips.
"This isn’t funny, Rogue. Who told?"
"What’s the matter, Jo?" She asked. "It’s not a big deal, and I swear that Professor X won’t hear about it from me." She crossed her fingers over her chest. "I promise you."
"Who told you?"
"Some of the boys were talking about it in the hallway, and I overheard."
"What boys?" I asked, just as Logan walked into the kitchen for a hot cup of coffee with the paper under his arm. He didn’t take notice of the two of us, instead opting to pour his coffee and take a seat by the window.
"I don’t remember who all was there." Rogue shrugged. "Let it go, Jo. It’s not a big deal, okay? You’re a very, very lucky girl."
"What if he finds out that everyone knows? He’s going to think that I told all of you!"
Rogue looked down at me. "I really don’t think so, Joanna. Relax."
I grabbed a muffin, and a juice box. "I gotta go finish getting ready. I’ll see you in class."
I ate my muffin on my way up the stairs to get my backpack. Some of the people I passed whistled at me, and patted my back. I was gritting my teeth until I reached my room. I leaned against the door once it was shut and sighed. Going to school was going to be hell. Everyone was sure to know about Logan and me kissing the night before. Part of me wanted the floor to open up and swallow me, the other part of me of was talking a calming voice, it was going to be OK. All I had to do was just survive through the day, and just hope that it wasn’t as bad as it seemed. I mean, I’m seventeen years old, I’m almost an adult. I’m a mature young woman, and I can take care of myself. If I wanted to kiss a much, much older man, well...so be it! ...Unless I can’t, in which case I am royally fucked.
Sundry
Prologue
Joanna’s POV
Close your eyes.
What do you see?
I see doors. Thousands and thousands of doors, constantly opening and closing, shifting around in my head like a combination lock. -Just like everything else in my life; constantly changing and shifting. I never seem to be able to find a place, and a time to just be...me. I never thought I could find anyone who would understand, I thought I was alone in the world, and then I was rescued.
See, I made the mistake of telling my mom and stepfather about my powers. My stepfather, Daniel, talked my Mom into abandoning me. They drugged me, and pushed me from their moving car at sixty-five miles-an-hour into a late-November snow drift. That’s where they left me to die: in the snow, by the side of the road. To die, or be killed. I guess they didn’t realize the possibility of me being saved.
And so, that’s what happened. I kept blacking out because of my injuries, but I remember Storm’s white hair, and Cyclops’s ruby-quartz visor. I vague remember Jean Grey, carefully using her levitation power to lift me from the snow bank. I felt safer once I was inside of their plane, and I didn’t wake up again until a voice inside of my head told me it was time to.
Professor Xavier told me I was at his school for the gift -for mutants, like me. He asked me what my powers were, and I told him. All of them.
When I was through, he whistled, and leaned back in his chair, "That’s quite a sundry. I think I rather like that, don’t you?"
"Like what?" I asked.
"Sundry."
And so my ‘real’ name, my mutant name became Sundry, while my human name, Joanna Darius, was displaced for personal use.
Chapter One
When I was well enough, and my regenerative power had healed my wounds and bruises. I was given a room assignment with Rogue, who at first seemed very stand-off, and stuck up. Then I realized it was because of her power. Rogue can’t have physical contact with people. Her power is to drain people of their life-source, or in the case of mutants, she can "borrow" their powers for a short time. It’s funny because I have the same power, except with the detail that I absorb powers, and keep them. My acquired "sundry" keeps me in check when I get into contact with people. My power gives me unlimited other powers, and I’ve acquired quite a few.
One of the first things we found out is that Rogue can only borrow my ‘active’ power. For example, if I’m using a telepathic power, she can borrow it, if I don’t have an active power, she can touch me and neither of us suffers any damage, as if we were both normal people.
The first power I lusted after was Nightcrawler’s teleporting powers (or as he liked to call it, ‘bamfing"). I didn’t have to touch him long to get it, either, and it was a total accidental-on-purpose that I got it in the first place. We had been in the Danger Room, my first week at the school, and Nightcrawler (Kurt) sort of...bamfed, right on top of me. My hand barely touched his skin for ten seconds, and I had absorbed the power. He blinked at me, his head and tail-tip spinning.
"Kurt!" I asked, after he had fallen back, and I could feel the power filtering through my body. "Are you OK?"
"Oh yah! I’m fine!" He grinned at me. "How are you?"
"I’m OK." I helped him up. "Try and watch where you’re going next time."
Rogue came over to us then, her arms crossed. "Sundry...did you just absorb his power?" She seemed disappointed.
"It was an accident. I can’t help it." I shrugged.
Logan, Wolverine, tried to get us back into formation. It wasn’t until later that I got to actually try the new power. Rogue watched over my test quietly, ready to go for help in case I got stuck in a wall or something. It worked well though, and I was pleased.
After I absorbed Kurt’s power though, I started wearing gloves, just in case. I had to be careful that I didn’t absorb the wrong power.
My day’s were usually basic, normal, teen stuff. With the exception of the Danger Room training sessions. They were to come to good use, soon before I, or anyone, expected. My skills weren’t exactly up-to-par, but with my assorted powers, I could kick-ass with the best of them. Or so I found out.
Rogue, Bobby (Iceman), Kitty, and I, along with Storm (as our chaperone) were at the mall for a shoe sale (well, Bobby was along for the ride). We hadn’t been there long when I noticed Logan standing by one of the vender’s counters. I’ll be the first to admit that I have a huge crush on Logan. I mean, what’s not to like? He’s cute, charming, dangerous, and did I mention drop-dead-sexy?
As I was saying, I saw Logan. So of course, I wanted to strike up a conversation. Only...come to find out, that it wasn’t Logan. I realized this when I touched his hand as I was flirting with him, without gloves. I jolt shook up my arms, rattling me for a moment. Logan looked worried.
"Are you alright?" He asked.
"Oh, yea. I’m fine." I shook my head, flexing my fingers, and glancing over at the clock. "Oh, wow! Look at the time! I better go regroup. Why don’t you come with me?"
Logan declined, as I knew he would. I then suggested that we meet for lunch, and he agreed.
When I met up with Storm, I told her what had happened. She seemed worried, and placed a call to Professor Xavier. There was backup sent to the mall: Cyclops, Jean Grey, and the real Logan. I was hoping that they were smart enough to come in on the other entrance on the other side of the mall. Jean Grey pulled me aside when the three of them arrived. She informed me of their plan. I was to approach the fake-Logan, pretending as though I still had no idea that it wasn’t the real Logan. If I got into any trouble, they would be there to back me up.
"So in other words, I go in and flirt with this...person, and pray that I don’t get kidnaped?" I asked.
"...Sort of." She told me. "Just, act like you normally would."
Right...easier said then done.
I met ‘Logan’ at a table near the back of the food court. I made light conversation, asking him what brought him to the mall, and he asked about school. After about ten minutes, he asked me if I wanted a ride back to the school -that was the ploy he was using. He was after me.
"No, I better ride back with Storm." I motioned behind me. "It might look bad if I-."
"What? Don’t you trust me?" He grabbed my upper arm, and yanked me closer. "Are you afraid of me, Sundry?"
My eyes got large, and widened. He knew that I knew, but Cyclops and Jean were already moving closer. Wolverine was coming up from behind. He grabbed the guy first by the back of the jacket. Cyclops had his finger on the side of his goggles and an itchy trigger finger.
"Mystique." Wolverine’s hands gripped around her throat, and I tore away from her. The form of the offensive perpetrator peeled away to reveal a blue-skinned woman with short, red hair. She grinned maliciously at Wolverine, and blew him a kiss. Then she flipped out of his hands, and morphed quickly into another form as she blended in with the mall crowd.
"You alright, kid?" Logan put a hand on my shoulder.
"I’m fine." I crossed my arms, watching as Mystique disappeared.
"We’d better get you back to the manor."
"I’m not sure what it is that Magneto wants with you, Sundry." Professor Xavier was pondering. "I think it’s safe to say, however, that you should stick around the school more, and limit your outside-activities, alright?"
"Alright." I nodded. I wasn’t about to disagree. I didn’t want to see more of this Mystique woman anyway. She seemed to be very well acquainted with all of the X-Men though.
"Be careful, Joanna. It would be a shame to loose such a gifted young woman, such as yourself." Professor Xavier patted my hand before letting me go.
I ran into Logan in the hallway. He stopped me with a hand on the shoulder. "How you doing, kid?"
"I’m fine." I shrugged. I wasn’t sure if I liked all of the attention I was getting. I wanted to figure out this Magneto guy’s plan, and why he wanted me. He obviously knew that I could absorb powers, but what if that wasn’t the power he wanted? If that was the case, he could have easily gotten any of the others that I had gotten powers from. So why me? "Just confused."
"Anything I can help you out with?" He asked. He actually sounded sincere.
"No, I’ll be fine, but thanks." I smiled, and ducked into the room I shared with Rogue. She was sitting cross legged on her bed, homework spread out across in front of her.
"Hi." She smiled. "Can you help me out with this?" She looked with loathing at one of her text books.
I helped her out, my brain still on Logan. This was more then a school-girl crush, and I felt awful about that. No one had any idea how old he was, or where he came from, and yet, I felt so attracted to him. Everything about him. A man who could well be older then my Grandfather, and all I could think about since that incident at the mall, was him. Not necessarily sleeping with him, but I’ll admit that ran though my mind a lot as well.
I wasn’t ever actually alone with Logan until a few days later. Storm and Cyclops had gone on a mission while Professor Xavier and Jean were at a conference in Washington. Logan had been left to watch over the students. I was sitting in the rec room on the couch, flipping through the channels. He leaned in the doorway when I had settled on the Sunday Night Sex Talk on Oxygen.
"Interesting choice." His voice growled behind me. A blink from me, flipped to cartoons.
"I thought everyone else was asleep." I hugged a throw pillow, tucking my feet under me, while he made himself comfortable on the other side of the couch. He picked up the remote and flipped it back.
"No, really. It’s an interesting choice for a seventeen year old girl on a late Sunday night." He raised an eyebrow at me. "You watch this often?"
"Often enough that I’ve seen this episode." I blinked my eyes again and flipped through the channels again. "Something in particular you’d care to watch?"
"They can’t show what I like on television -for free anyway."
I stopped and looked at him. A smirk crossed his lips, and turned away again.
"Is there somethin’ wrong, kid?" He asked, touching my foot. His hands were warm, and kind of rough against my skin.
"No, I’m fine." I said, moving my foot away, onto the floor. "I should go to bed. Goodnight, Logan."
I was already half way out of the room when he called me back. He got up from his seat, and took my wrists in his hands. Then he tugged me closer to him, kissing me. We both savored the moment for an extra second or so.
"I shouldn’t have done that." His voice was low and raspy. "I’m supposed to be watching over you, not molesting you."
"I wasn’t complaining."He released my wrists, and took a step back from me. "I better go to bed."
"Good night, Joanna.."
"G’ night."
I saw Rogue the next morning in the kitchen, and she tapped one of her boots against the back of my leg. "What were you thinking, last night, Joanna?"
"What are you talking about?" I asked.
"You and Mr. Logan. It’s all over school."
"What?" I asked, pulling her into a corner. "What about Logan and me?"
"That you kissed him in the corridor last night when everyone was either away or asleep. What was it like?" She asked, a grin spreading across her lips.
"This isn’t funny, Rogue. Who told?"
"What’s the matter, Jo?" She asked. "It’s not a big deal, and I swear that Professor X won’t hear about it from me." She crossed her fingers over her chest. "I promise you."
"Who told you?"
"Some of the boys were talking about it in the hallway, and I overheard."
"What boys?" I asked, just as Logan walked into the kitchen for a hot cup of coffee with the paper under his arm. He didn’t take notice of the two of us, instead opting to pour his coffee and take a seat by the window.
"I don’t remember who all was there." Rogue shrugged. "Let it go, Jo. It’s not a big deal, okay? You’re a very, very lucky girl."
"What if he finds out that everyone knows? He’s going to think that I told all of you!"
Rogue looked down at me. "I really don’t think so, Joanna. Relax."
I grabbed a muffin, and a juice box. "I gotta go finish getting ready. I’ll see you in class."
I ate my muffin on my way up the stairs to get my backpack. Some of the people I passed whistled at me, and patted my back. I was gritting my teeth until I reached my room. I leaned against the door once it was shut and sighed. Going to school was going to be hell. Everyone was sure to know about Logan and me kissing the night before. Part of me wanted the floor to open up and swallow me, the other part of me of was talking a calming voice, it was going to be OK. All I had to do was just survive through the day, and just hope that it wasn’t as bad as it seemed. I mean, I’m seventeen years old, I’m almost an adult. I’m a mature young woman, and I can take care of myself. If I wanted to kiss a much, much older man, well...so be it! ...Unless I can’t, in which case I am royally fucked.
Egad!
Wow! I guess I didn't really forget about my blogspot journal, I just...I never remember my login! It's much different from my others. If people actually are reading this, well, if you expect to know anything about me, you're in the wrong place!!! I post more on my Xanga site: xanga.com/thepq4, almost every day in fact. Well, that being said, I guess I'll go back to getting you all up to date on what I've been writing. Ta! ~Samma
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Farrago '05
This is my farrago from the '05 Forensics Season.
Boy loves boy, and girl loves girl; an prospect a lot of people would rather not acknowledge. The topic has been covered in various pieces of literature, a few of which I will share in novel cuttings, song lyrics, and poetry.
Lynn Hall wrote Sticks and Stones in 1972. Tom is new to Buck Creek, Iowa where he befriends Ward, a writer, who has been discharged from the Armed Services. In my first cutting, Tom has just confessed to Ward that he has never really liked women and he sees himself as being alone for the rest of his life.
“God,” Ward said. “This is it. I’m going to kill the whole thing, but I can’t keep quiet any longer. Now just shut up and listen till I get through, will you? When we first met each other, I told you I’d gotten a medical discharge from the service because of asthma. I didn’t. I was discharged because of a ‘homosexual involvement’ with another guy in very firmly that any genuine love is a good and necessary thing, whether it comes from a man, a woman, a child, pet, or whatever. I believe every individual should try to find the kind of love that fills his needs, no matter what society says.
“No, don’t interrupt. I’m not finished yet. You’re wondering about you and me, so I’ll tell you as honestly as I can. Because I am a writer, and because I am the kind of person I am, I don’t like having a lot of people around me, but at the same time I AM human and I do need someone whose…close. I’m not talking about anything physical now. I just mean someone who cares about the daily details of my life and someone whose live I can care about in return. You could call it a kind of love if you wanted to, but I want to make one thing clear right now. I’d never in the world endanger whatever friendship you might feel for me by making any kind of, you know, physical advance or anything like that, that would be unwelcome. I have my pride, and I can understand your feelings about the whole thing.
“So, I’ll just say it once, and then we’ll forget about it. Yes, in the purest form of the word, I love you. It’s been very good for me to have somebody I can feel this way about. But, by god, I never wanted you to be hurt by it.
Come to My Window was a song written and preformed by Melissa Etheridge and written while she was in college to a lover.
I would dial the numbers
Just to listen to your breath
And I would stand inside my hell
And hold the hand of death
You don’t know how far I’d go
To ease this precious ache
You don’t know how much I’d give
Or how much I can take
Keeping my eyes open
I cannot afford to sleep
Giving away promises
I know that I can’t keep
Nothing fills this blackness
That has seeped into my chest
I need you in my blood
I am forsaking all the rest
I don’t care what they think
I don’t care what they say
What do they know about this love anyway
Alex Sanchez’s novel Rainbow Boys was published in 2001 and deals with 3 high school boys “coming out” to their families and friends. In this portion of the book, Nelson, an openly gay and flamboyant boy, is trying to get his best friend to realize that he cares about him in a way other then as friends.
Nelson stood up and stretched. “Come on Kyle. Let’s do something!”
“Like what?” Kyle asked.
“I don’t know. Aren’t you dying to find out what sex is like?”
Kyle gave a shrug. “I can wait.”
“Wait! Life’s to short, Kyle. It’s passing us by. I get bashed every day for being queer, and I haven’t even kissed a guy yet. That’s pretty pathetic.” He shook a cigarette from his pack. Then a brilliant idea dawned on him. “Hey, how about if we practice?”
Kyle raised an eyebrow. “Practice what?”
“You know…” Nelson lit up a cigarette. “Making out.”
Kyle pressed his glasses up on the ridge of his nose looking confused. “With who? You mean-“ He suddenly sat upright. “You’re crazy!”
“Why not?” Nelson insisted. “It’s just practice.”
Kyle shook his head. “I can’t kiss you. It would feel like…kissing my sister! You’re my friend. It would feel to weird.”
Nelson cupped his hand over his mouth to test his breath. “You afraid I have AIDS? Rabies?”
Kyle glared at him. “Mad cow disease.”
“Screw you!” Nelson puffed on his cigarette. “You’ll let my dog lick your face, but you won’t kiss me? That makes me feel really special.”
A guilty look crossed Kyle’s face. “It just doesn’t feel right.”
Nelson decided to make the most of Kyle’s guilt. “I’ll put on some mood music.” He ran to the stereo and grabbed a Tony Bennett CD. “It’ll be fun.”
“No way.” Kyle shook his head.
Nelson threw his arms around Kyle.
“Mon cheri! The night is young, the moon is full, and you are so handsome.” He began smacking kisses on Kyle’s neck.
“Nelson, stop it!” Kyle pulled away. Nelson rose up to kiss him on the mouth, and Kyle swung to block him, but instead his hand hit Nelson’s chin with a smack.
Walt Whitman was a great American poet. In the following poem, O Tan-Faced Prairie Boy, was published in his Leaves of Grass anthology, which was banned when first published for some of the explicitness of his sometimes erotic poems.
O Tan-faced Prairie boy
Before you came to camp came many a welcome gift,
Praises and presents came and nourishing food, till at least among the recruits
You came, taciturn, with nothing to give –we but look’d on each other,
When lo! More then all the gifts in the world, you gave me.
My final piece is a monologue adapted from the film Four Weddings and a Funeral. Matthew reads the following as his eulogy to his best friend, and lover Garreth.
Garreth used to prefer funerals to weddings. He said it was easier to get enthusiastic about a ceremony one had an outside chance of eventually being involved in. In order to prepare this speech, I rang a few people, to get a general picture of how Garreth was regarded by those who met him. Fat seems to be a word people most connected with him. Terribly rude also rang a lot of bells. On the other hand, some of you have been kind enough to ring me to tell me that you loved him, which I know he'd be thrilled to hear. You remember his fabulous hospitality...his strange experimental cooking. Most of all, you tell me of his enormous capacity for joy. Joyful is how I hope you'll remember him, not stuck in a box in a church. Pick your favorite of his vests and remember him that way. The most splendid, replete, big-hearted, weak-hearted as it turned out, and jolly bugger most of us ever met. As for me, you may ask how I'll remember him, what I thought of him. Unfortunately there, I don't have words. Perhaps you will forgive me if I turn from my own feelings to the words of another splendid bugger: W.H. Auden. This is actually what I wanted to say:
'Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephonePrevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone.Silence the pianos and with muffled drum,Bring out the coffin...let the mourners come.
Let aeroplanes circle, moaning overhead,Scribbling on the sky the message: He is Dead.Put crepe bows 'round the necks of public doves,Let traffic policemen wear black, cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East, my West.My working week and my Sunday rest.My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song,I thought love would last forever: I was wrong.The stars are not wanted now, put out every one.Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun.Pour out the ocean and sweep up the wood,For nothing now can ever come to any good."
Boy loves boy, and girl loves girl; an prospect a lot of people would rather not acknowledge. The topic has been covered in various pieces of literature, a few of which I will share in novel cuttings, song lyrics, and poetry.
Lynn Hall wrote Sticks and Stones in 1972. Tom is new to Buck Creek, Iowa where he befriends Ward, a writer, who has been discharged from the Armed Services. In my first cutting, Tom has just confessed to Ward that he has never really liked women and he sees himself as being alone for the rest of his life.
“God,” Ward said. “This is it. I’m going to kill the whole thing, but I can’t keep quiet any longer. Now just shut up and listen till I get through, will you? When we first met each other, I told you I’d gotten a medical discharge from the service because of asthma. I didn’t. I was discharged because of a ‘homosexual involvement’ with another guy in very firmly that any genuine love is a good and necessary thing, whether it comes from a man, a woman, a child, pet, or whatever. I believe every individual should try to find the kind of love that fills his needs, no matter what society says.
“No, don’t interrupt. I’m not finished yet. You’re wondering about you and me, so I’ll tell you as honestly as I can. Because I am a writer, and because I am the kind of person I am, I don’t like having a lot of people around me, but at the same time I AM human and I do need someone whose…close. I’m not talking about anything physical now. I just mean someone who cares about the daily details of my life and someone whose live I can care about in return. You could call it a kind of love if you wanted to, but I want to make one thing clear right now. I’d never in the world endanger whatever friendship you might feel for me by making any kind of, you know, physical advance or anything like that, that would be unwelcome. I have my pride, and I can understand your feelings about the whole thing.
“So, I’ll just say it once, and then we’ll forget about it. Yes, in the purest form of the word, I love you. It’s been very good for me to have somebody I can feel this way about. But, by god, I never wanted you to be hurt by it.
Come to My Window was a song written and preformed by Melissa Etheridge and written while she was in college to a lover.
I would dial the numbers
Just to listen to your breath
And I would stand inside my hell
And hold the hand of death
You don’t know how far I’d go
To ease this precious ache
You don’t know how much I’d give
Or how much I can take
Keeping my eyes open
I cannot afford to sleep
Giving away promises
I know that I can’t keep
Nothing fills this blackness
That has seeped into my chest
I need you in my blood
I am forsaking all the rest
I don’t care what they think
I don’t care what they say
What do they know about this love anyway
Alex Sanchez’s novel Rainbow Boys was published in 2001 and deals with 3 high school boys “coming out” to their families and friends. In this portion of the book, Nelson, an openly gay and flamboyant boy, is trying to get his best friend to realize that he cares about him in a way other then as friends.
Nelson stood up and stretched. “Come on Kyle. Let’s do something!”
“Like what?” Kyle asked.
“I don’t know. Aren’t you dying to find out what sex is like?”
Kyle gave a shrug. “I can wait.”
“Wait! Life’s to short, Kyle. It’s passing us by. I get bashed every day for being queer, and I haven’t even kissed a guy yet. That’s pretty pathetic.” He shook a cigarette from his pack. Then a brilliant idea dawned on him. “Hey, how about if we practice?”
Kyle raised an eyebrow. “Practice what?”
“You know…” Nelson lit up a cigarette. “Making out.”
Kyle pressed his glasses up on the ridge of his nose looking confused. “With who? You mean-“ He suddenly sat upright. “You’re crazy!”
“Why not?” Nelson insisted. “It’s just practice.”
Kyle shook his head. “I can’t kiss you. It would feel like…kissing my sister! You’re my friend. It would feel to weird.”
Nelson cupped his hand over his mouth to test his breath. “You afraid I have AIDS? Rabies?”
Kyle glared at him. “Mad cow disease.”
“Screw you!” Nelson puffed on his cigarette. “You’ll let my dog lick your face, but you won’t kiss me? That makes me feel really special.”
A guilty look crossed Kyle’s face. “It just doesn’t feel right.”
Nelson decided to make the most of Kyle’s guilt. “I’ll put on some mood music.” He ran to the stereo and grabbed a Tony Bennett CD. “It’ll be fun.”
“No way.” Kyle shook his head.
Nelson threw his arms around Kyle.
“Mon cheri! The night is young, the moon is full, and you are so handsome.” He began smacking kisses on Kyle’s neck.
“Nelson, stop it!” Kyle pulled away. Nelson rose up to kiss him on the mouth, and Kyle swung to block him, but instead his hand hit Nelson’s chin with a smack.
Walt Whitman was a great American poet. In the following poem, O Tan-Faced Prairie Boy, was published in his Leaves of Grass anthology, which was banned when first published for some of the explicitness of his sometimes erotic poems.
O Tan-faced Prairie boy
Before you came to camp came many a welcome gift,
Praises and presents came and nourishing food, till at least among the recruits
You came, taciturn, with nothing to give –we but look’d on each other,
When lo! More then all the gifts in the world, you gave me.
My final piece is a monologue adapted from the film Four Weddings and a Funeral. Matthew reads the following as his eulogy to his best friend, and lover Garreth.
Garreth used to prefer funerals to weddings. He said it was easier to get enthusiastic about a ceremony one had an outside chance of eventually being involved in. In order to prepare this speech, I rang a few people, to get a general picture of how Garreth was regarded by those who met him. Fat seems to be a word people most connected with him. Terribly rude also rang a lot of bells. On the other hand, some of you have been kind enough to ring me to tell me that you loved him, which I know he'd be thrilled to hear. You remember his fabulous hospitality...his strange experimental cooking. Most of all, you tell me of his enormous capacity for joy. Joyful is how I hope you'll remember him, not stuck in a box in a church. Pick your favorite of his vests and remember him that way. The most splendid, replete, big-hearted, weak-hearted as it turned out, and jolly bugger most of us ever met. As for me, you may ask how I'll remember him, what I thought of him. Unfortunately there, I don't have words. Perhaps you will forgive me if I turn from my own feelings to the words of another splendid bugger: W.H. Auden. This is actually what I wanted to say:
'Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephonePrevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone.Silence the pianos and with muffled drum,Bring out the coffin...let the mourners come.
Let aeroplanes circle, moaning overhead,Scribbling on the sky the message: He is Dead.Put crepe bows 'round the necks of public doves,Let traffic policemen wear black, cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East, my West.My working week and my Sunday rest.My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song,I thought love would last forever: I was wrong.The stars are not wanted now, put out every one.Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun.Pour out the ocean and sweep up the wood,For nothing now can ever come to any good."
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